Chapter 383 - Step Back But Not Give Up

"Yes…"

Alinea was already prepared to hear this answer as well. But now that she did hear him say it, it felt as if there's a small twitch in her heart, making her sad. She knew she was feeling something akin to rejection. If it was from a lover or a friend, one could still justify it. But the rejection was from her very own mother. It was…

Sad. There was no other word she could use to describe it.

As if sensing her emotions, Perun smiled at her softly as he brushed her hair with his hand.  "Don't be sad my little one. Your mother did not reject you the way you think."

Alinea frowned and spoke in a cynical manner. "Are there other ways of rejection?"

A rejection was a rejection regardless of reason, right?

"No," Perun murmured as he shook his head at her. "When people are ignorant of the big picture, they tend to make some decisions just based on incomplete information."

"What does that mean? Didn't you tell her about us?"Alinea couldn't understand.

Perun shook his head again. "We told her about deities. We didn't tell her about her past life."

Alinea's eyes widened in surprised as she sat up and shifted to face her father. "Are you saying that she chose to forget just because she thought she was dealing with deities and wants to live a normal life after the incident with the shadow lurkers?"

"Yes," Perun answered, and her surprise turned into bewilderment.

"But why? Father, it was a great chance for her to know about who we are to her – that I'm her daughter and you are her husband!"

Alinea's body was tensed as she stood up; she was obviously feeling aggrieved. But Perun seemed to understand her.

"Little one, hear your father out," Perun crooned as he held his daughter's hand and pulled her back down.

Alinea seemed to snap from her rage but calmed herself down enough to sit back down and listen to her father's explanation. Still, she bit her lip tightly.

"Don't bite your lips – you will injure yourself," Perun cajoled as he brushed a finger to her lips, and Alinea followed.

"Ali, as a broken soul, you have experienced having memories from different sources when you fused together. Am I correct?" he asked softly.

Alinea stopped to think. Indeed. She was someone who was broken into three pieces. Although the third piece was the spawn and didn't really have its own memories, when she died in Ritz and transferred to earth, she was able to awaken with memories of Suzuki Ara. However, even if she was also Ara, the memories felt so distant – like something that was unrelated to her. Her current relationship with her friends and Aki were forged by her new self and not because of her memories as Ara.

"Y-Yes…" She whispered her answer as she now somewhat realized the purpose of her father's question. She felt ashamed of her selfishness. She bowed her head in shame as a sheepish smile plastered on her face.

Perun still smiled at her kindly. "It seems you already understand," he said as he turned to look up at the sky. "As a broken soul, even if you already attain memories from when you are Ara, they still felt foreign. Your mother's a blank soul – someone who didn't have any memories at all. Can you imagine now how she'd feel when she's suddenly told that she has a daughter and a child with someone she had no memories of?"

"I'm sure she couldn't take it," Alinea acquiesced with s heavy sigh.

If she who could remember things still felt disconnected, what more Yuuka who had no traces of her past life at all?

"I understand. I'm so sorry for being so thoughtless," she murmured, and her father patted her head.

"It's alright. It's normal to want to connect with her. She's your mother after all."Perun had on a bittersweet smile, and her heart broke for him. "I'm so sorry that I can't give you the reunion you deserve, little one…"

Moisture filled her eyes and soon they made trails down her cheeks as she shook her head. "It's alright. I don't mind," she said.

It would be more heartbreaking if they forced her mother to know who she was but her emotions were no longer connected to them. The punishment of Rod to those who harbored something vile within them was cruel.

"Don't worry little one. Don't cry. Even if father seemed to step back now, I have not completely given up on your mother." A determined expression crossed Perun's face as a fire burned within the violet depths of his eyes.

This time, Alinea looked up at him again in surprise. "You… haven't?"

At her disbelieving tone, Perun let out a soft chuckle. "I haven't. How could I? If it weren't for the absolute rule handed out by Rod, I would have found ways to make her reincarnate and would have found her sooner. You would have had your mother almost immediately after she died. Or she wouldn't have died at all."

It was true. The reason why Perun stayed on the mortal plane after marrying Shitara was at first because of her family. He originally decided to live amongst the mortals until his in-law's natural deaths. Normally as his wife, Shitara would stop aging as well, so he planned to ascend to the Celestial Plane with her when that time came. This was why he never found out about the spawn until Fanya appeared. It was because it happened just four years after he met Shitara, three years after they wed.

Perun was caught unawares. The price of staying on the mortal plane was losing the potency of his powers. It was why he failed to see what was going on until it was too late. Shitara died and she reincarnated as a blank soul – someone who Perun couldn't find even with his powers.

"My pain and desperation on that day I lost your mother still linger in my heart, little one. In all of these years, you are the only one who keeps me going."Perun framed his daughter's face with his hands. "But Rod has taken pity in this servant and has let me meet her once again. After I fulfill my promise to your mother to remove your curse, I will work hard to win her again…"

Alinea's eyes warmed over the same way her ċhėst filled with hope. As she looked at her father, she remembered something from a long, long time ago when Alistair told her about the story of the King of Heaven he dreamt to be written in the future.

"The book of how Perun finally fulfilled his promises to his child and wife, and they all ascended to the heavens to live together for all eternity…" she recited, surprising Perun, and she smiled. "I will do my best to end the curse so that my father can be free to woo my mother and we can all go home…"