Changing the subject, Kimberly says excitedly, “We should go out tonight right after the last talk. On Sunday those two will be in meetings all morning, so we’ll do some shopping then. We’ll go out tonight, and maybe Saturday night, too. What do you think?”

“Go out where?” I laugh. “I’m only eighteen.”

“Oh, please. Christian knows a lot of people in Seattle. If you’re with him, you can get in anywhere.” I love the way her eyes light up when she speaks of Mr. Vance, even though he’s already right next to her.

“Okay,” I say. I’ve never been “out” before. I’ve been to the few parties at the frat house, but I haven’t ever been to a nightclub or anything even close.

“It’ll be fun, don’t worry,” she assures me. “And you should definitely wear that dress,” she adds with a laugh.

Chapter ten

HARDIN

You will be alone for the rest of your life, and for that I feel sorry for you. I’ll move on, find a nice man who’ll treat me the way you should have, and we’ll get married and have children. I will be happy.

Tessa’s words keep playing over and over in my head. I know she’s right, but I so desperately don’t want her to be. I had never minded being alone until now—now I know what I’m missing.

“You in?” Jace’s voice breaks through my muddled thoughts.

“Uh, what?” I ask. I almost forgot that I was driving.

He rolls his eyes and takes a hit from his joint.

“I asked if you were in. We’re going to Zed’s.”

I groan. “I don’t know . . .”

“Why not? You need to stop being such a pussy. You’re moping around like a fucking baby.”

I glare at him. If I had gotten any sleep last night, I’d reach across and choke him. “I am not,” I say slowly.

“You so are, dude. You need to get wasted and laid tonight. I’m sure there’ll be some easy girls there.”

“I don’t need to get laid.” I don’t want anyone but her.

“Well, come on, drive over to Zed’s. If you don’t want to get laid, then at least come have a few beers,” he says.

“Don’t you ever want to do more?” I ask and he looks over at me like I’ve grown horns.

“What?”

“You know, doesn’t it feel like it’s getting old just partying and hooking up with different girls all the time?”

“Whoa, whoa—this is worse than I thought. You got it bad, man!”

“No, I don’t. I’m just saying. Doing the same old shit all the time gets old.”

He doesn’t know how enjoyable it is to lie in bed and make Tessa laugh, he doesn’t know how fun it is to hear her ramble on about her favorite novels, to have her swat at me when I try to grope her. It’s much better than any party that I’ve ever been to or will ever go to.

“She really did a number on you. That’s some shit, isn’t it?” He laughs.

“No, she didn’t,” I lie.

“Sure . . .” He throws the remainder of his joint out of my car window. “She’s single, though, right?” he asks, and when I grip the wheel he laughs even harder. “I’m just fucking around, Scott. Just wanted to see how pissed you would get.”

“Fuck off,” I grumble, and to prove a point, I turn on the back road to Zed’s.

Chapter eleven

TESSA

The Four Seasons in Seattle is the nicest hotel I have ever seen. I try to walk slowly to take in all the beautiful details, but Kimberly practically drags me onto the elevator and down the hall, leaving Trevor and Mr. Vance in her wake.

Stopping in front of a door, she says, “Here’s your room. After you unpack, we’ll meet in our suite to go over the itinerary for the weekend, even though I already know you’ve already done this. You should change, because I really think you should save that dress for tonight when we go out.” She winks and strolls off down the hall.

The differences between my hotel from the last two nights and this one are vast. One painting from the lobby here probably costs more than what they spent decorating an entire room at the other place. The view from my window is incredible. Seattle is such a beautiful city. I can easily imagine myself living here, in a high-rise apartment with a job at Seattle Publishing, or even Vance Publishing, now that they’re opening an office here. That would be amazing.

After I hang up my clothes for the weekend, I change into a black pencil skirt and a lilac shirt. I’m excited about the conference, but nervous about going out. I know I need to have some fun, but it’s all new to me and I still feel empty from the damage Hardin has caused.

By the time I get to Kimberly and Mr. Vance’s suite, it’s two thirty. I’m anxious because I know we should be downstairs in the banquet room by three.

Kimberly greets me warmly when she opens the door and leads me inside. Their suite has its own living room and a separate sitting room. It looks bigger than my mother’s entire house.

“This is . . . wow,” I say.

Mr. Vance laughs and pours himself a glass of what looks like water. “It’s okay.”

“We ordered some room service so we can all eat a little something before we head downstairs. It should be here any minute,” Kimberly says, and I smile and thank her. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until she mentioned food. I haven’t eaten at all today.

“You ready to be bored out of your mind?” Trevor asks as he appears from the sitting room.