Chapter 104 - Every Good Backup Plan Needs a Backup Plan

[Clap of the Sun Conure]

The sun conure was argued to be the parakeet with the brightest and most vibrant plumage amongst mortal birds. It was hunted to supposed extinction long ago by ignorant mortals wishing to cage its beauty for their own amusement and profit.

The technique supposedly originated from a legendary cultivator who was trapped within a [Formation of Darkness]. After accepting that he would be unable to leave the formation before he died, he detached himself from the external and decided to spend the remainder of his life within his memories. It was at this time he realized that his life was filled with endless strife and blood. The only truly peaceful and happy moments had been spent alongside his sun conure parakeet as a mortal youth.

Spending a century in his memories, he accompanied his pet bird that had died eons ago until a flash of insight occurred while petting the bird's feathers for the umpteenth time. He clapped, and a beautifully, blinding light encompassed him and the formation, briefly revealing a path out of the formation.

Later on, he devoted his life to painting pictures of his beloved animal companion, immortalizing the technique he created.

As a skill that allowed one to instantly blind another's vision, mastering it required one to spend an extravagant amount of type observing copies of these ancient paintings and diagrams of the extinct sun conure.

Gao Diao and Kondo instinctively closed their eyes and shut off their divine sense.

"Hmph. You're definitely going to lose, you shameless weasel!"

This was his chance.

[Woodpecker Thrust]

Like the beak of a woodpecker, Ariyoshi Miji's hand thrusted in a downward diagonal, grabbing and pulling Gao Diao's pants to the ground.

With 10% of one pant leg still hanging on, Ariyoshi Miji still had a path to victory as long as he could resolve one of his two brothers now. Even if he lost in the end, he had to ensure his eternal rival lost first.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!?!"

It was Ariyoshi Miji's turn to be completely stunned.

...

Experts who had reached their status would normally retain some modicum of decorum and avoid such crude vulgarity, especially in front of the younger generations, but he could not control himself.

Jumping out of his pulled-down pants, Gao tossed several additional Qi-restoring pills into his mouth while signalling Kondo, "Now, Third Brother!"

It took less than a tenth of a second for them to recover from Ariyoshi Miji's [Clap of the Sun Conure], but at their cultivation stage, that amount of time could separate victory from defeat, as shown by Gao Diao having suddenly lost his second pair of pants.

Containing his shock from seeing Gao Diao's third set of pants, Kondo coordinated with him.

The ground beneath them quaked, and his warhammer erupted from beneath Ariyoshi Miji's feet, surprising him before he could regain his composure.

The ground continued trembling as vines grew out and completely trapped the three of them in a large dome of long, pine needles sharp enough to shred any cloth passing through them. Perhaps a perfect pair of trousers could manage to survive the pine needles after suffering numerous rips and tears, but Ariyoshi Miji's nearly-destroyed pants would certainly meet its grave.

Everything happened so fast, he had not had time to discard Gao Diao's pants before using both palms to block the giant warhammer.

BAM!

He and the hammer were sent flying.

Unable to extricate himself from the projectile, he barreled towards the wall of the dome setup by the bristly vines. With a single sweep of his divine sense, he immediately understood their plan and had to act fast.

Placing five fingertips on the head of the hammer, Ariyoshi Miji twisted his palm in a seemingly gentle manner, completely halting the projectile's forward momentum a dozen meters before reaching the vines.

Punch! Kick! Stab! Stab!

He had no time for rest as he was greeted by Kondo, Gao Diao, and a combination of their fists, kicks and flying swords, all intent on pushing him through that wall of cloth-destroying shrubbery.

He quickly utilized his [Hummingbird Flutter] once more, but with so many attackers in front of him and a wall behind him, he lacked enough room to maneuver safely. He was repeatedly pushed back despite pushing his agility to the maximum.

Ten meters.

Nine meters.

Eight meters.

"Why isn't this coming off? What did you do to it?!"

Although many things had happened since he used the [Clap of the Sun Conure], less than three seconds had passed in reality.

Originally, he had held on to the pants intending to demonstrate Gao Diao's loss to the vice elder, but its purpose was now moot. With no time to spare due to the surprise attack and their relentless ȧssault, he could not discard the Sixth Elder's pants without giving the other two elders a potentially fatal opening.

He believed the Sixth Elder's pants would be flung away or torn to shreds as the three Nascent Soul experts fought, but the surface of the pants seemed to be stuck to his palm and imbued with a strong enchantment that made it durable enough to withstand their high-level movements. No matter how hard he swung, attacked or parried, the pants would not leave his palm, hindering his movements ever so slightly.

"A gift to you, brother, since yours are nearly torn to pieces. I even spent some time placing a Sticky Gluey Enchantment on it so that you won't lose them too."

Ariyoshi Miji ground his teeth in anger, unwilling and unable to retort. Gao Diao aimed to disturb his emotions so that he would make a mistake, but he would not give him the pŀėȧsurė.

Seven meters.

Six meters.

Five meters.

Although he was being pushed back, Ariyoshi Miji bȧrėly managed to slow down their advance. Even though the pants were an encumbrance to the small warrior, the large Kondo's speed noticeably declined with every passing second. The boost from the pill Gao Diao fed him decreased with each passing second.

The pill's efficacy was obviously worse than the one Gao Diao used on himself.

"You've already grown sluggish, Third Brother, yet Sixth Brother's as spry as a fox. Ours are almost gone, yet he still has one whole set completely untouched. Help me skin him first to make sure there's no fourth one underneath it, and I'll forfeit the match to you," Ariyoshi Miji tempted Kondo.

"Don't be ridiculous, Fourth Brother. Do I look like a boutique that has a limitless number of pants? I ȧssure you that this one is my last," Gao Diao reassured them. He fought Ariyoshi Miji's words with his own.

"Three pants is normal, but four is ridiculous?" Ariyoshi Miji gnashed his teeth in annoyance at Gao Diao's thick skin, his words drenched in sarcasm.

Regardless, all three recognized that the super thin and tight pants he wore were leggings meant to be worn as undėrwėȧr during the cold seasons. Their eyesight was good enough to ascertain that there was absolutely no more layers in between the leggings and his skin.

Both of Ariyoshi Miji's pant legs had been ripped to the point where they did not cover much more than Kondo's fundoshi. He could feel the occasional gusts and cold metal originating from their fierce punches and swords breeze past his two buŧŧȯċks.

If things continued this way, he might be stripped without being forced through the vines!

Four meters.

Three meters.

Kondo slowed down his attacks, not only because the pill had worn off, but also because Ariyoshi Miji's words held some truth. Once they defeated him, Kondo's own circumstances would not improve by much.

His "pants" was essentially undėrwėȧr without any special reinforcement or enchantments keeping it together. His own movements were already restricted by the cloth's delicate structure, afraid any stretch or random attack would tear it apart while he was not carefully watching it.

His eyes synced with Ariyoshi Miji's eyes mid-brawl, and they came to a tacit understanding without exchanging any words.

They would attack together at the last instant when victory was at Gao Diao's fingertip.

Kondo knew Ariyoshi Miji would not forfeit once Gao Diao had lost, but he believed that his odds of beating him and his nearly-destroyed pants were significantly better than triumphing over his wily, more intelligent brother who had just taken Qi-restoring pills and never ran out of tricks.

Two meters.

One meter.

Gao Diao stepped forward and thrusted a palm attack towards Ariyoshi Miji.

'Now!'

Ariyoshi Miji deflected the palm as best he could while narrowly dodging two flying swords.

Kondo embraced Gao Diao from behind with both of his gorilla arms holding him completely still.

"B-brother! What's the meaning of this?!"

Surprised, he struggled against Kondo's herculean body hold, but he could not escape. Vines emerged out of the ground, blindly flailing everywhere in an effort to make him retreat, to no avail.

"You're out of tricks, 'ol Sixth!" Ariyoshi Miji beamed as he dove at Gao Diao's leggings one final time.

Gao Diao's panicked expression immediately switched to a snicker when Ariyoshi Miji's hands had reached his pants, causing Kondo and Ariyoshi Miji's hearts to shudder.

Gao Diao's right hand formed a dozen seals in an instant.

"Activate!"

Numerous runes began glowing within the inner lining of the pants that were still glued to Ariyoshi Miji's hand.

"FU—"

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!