Chapter 217: Wavering and Uncertain

"Moulin..." 

Aedion called, with worry gracing his green eyes as he began to walk forward. His steps were slow as if hesitating to come near the silver-eyed young man. Under the warm light of the day, shining from the windows, Aedion's frown became clear before Moulin's eyes.

"Sir Aedion." Addressed Moulin with a faint smile. An uneasy feeling settles in the depths of his heart. He stopped in his steps, making Snow and Keir stare at their master curiously.

Hearing Moulin's seemingly depressed tone. Aedion's concern grew. It was like the brightness in his eyes have disappeared, replaced by neutrality and perturbation. He wondered what Hadrian had done to make Moulin become like this. Regret washed over him like a tidal wave. He shouldn't have left Moulin Moulin believing that Moulin could settle things with Hadrian. 

With distressed eyes, Aedion spoke. "Are you alright? I heard you suddenly requested Lord Hendrick a change of room."

Moulin furrowed his brows. "It's none of your concern, Sir. Nothing significant happened..."

Moulin didn't want to drag more people between him and Hadrian, knowing the lord's personality of being too... possessive. Moulin inhaled before sighing.

He faced Aedion with a smile, "If you excuse me, I must be going..."

Before Moulin could walk past him, Aedion spoke up. "Wait. Are you truly alright? You look pale. If there is something I can do. Please... tell me."

Moulin felt touched by his concern, but it didn't lighten the feeling in his heart. For some reason, Moulin felt that conversing with the man in front was a good idea. So with a gentle expression, Moulin only replied, "Thank you for your concern, but I don't think there is any need to." He smiled before he nodded to Aedion. 

Aedion swallowed. Helplessly, he nodded to Moulin as the youth walked past him. Air brush his shoulders. He was aware of Moulin's intent of avoiding him. Perhaps, it was not the right time for him to boldly face the young man. He didn't know what Moulin had gone through to let Aedion escape Hadrian, but he knew it wasn't something appealing.

He turned his head and watched the first doors of the treasury closed behind him.

......................

Moulin had wished none of the things that happened yesterday had occurred. Perhaps, he would be lying in Hadrian's embrace, feeling the warmth of his touch and the gentleness of his words. Admittedly, Moulin could not deny his longing. However, he could also not let go of his confusion and pain as well. At least, not yet. 

They needed time. Moulin needed time. If he were back to the man he was in his previous life, he would've chased Hadrian and desperately try to fix the problems of what caused their fight, like the fool that he previously was. However, now he would stop for his cause. 

"Moulin..." 

Silver eyes snapped open as the youth yanked himself out from his thoughts. He raised his head and met the worried eyes of his dear mother in the mirror. Her hair was tied up in a clean updo, and she was garbed plainly. Her neck and her wrists were covered. Shame filled his face when he realized he had not paid attention to what his mother was saying. Lowering his head, he apologized. "Ah, forgive me, mother."

Lady Maxille softened her eyes. "What is it that is troubling you, dear?"

"No. It's nothing important." Moulin smiled as he shook his head. 

His mother frowned, not convinced of his words. Clearly, he was hiding something from her. She could tell from his eyes. A sigh left her lips, and she looked at her son. "Moulin... Is it between you and the lord?"

Moulin flinched. Confused about why she had guessed right. However, he only furrowed his brows and turned away. Unable to speak a word.

Lady Maxiel hid the hope in her heart. Does Moulin find his time with the lord uncomfortable? Does he now realize how unsuitable they are? Questions swam in her mind, and he could not help but see a light of hope in their situation. With a determined gaze, she opens her mouth to take advantage of the situation. 

However, she stopped. 

The bitter look in her son's eyes engraved itself in her heart. There was sorrow, helplessness, and uncertainty. As though he could no longer do something in fear of making the situation worse. Lady Maxiel fell into silence. 

Hurt. Her youngest son was hurt. There was aching distress within those previously bright eyes of silver pupils. As a mother, Lady Maxiel felt panic and anguish. She couldn't bear to see Moulin so joyless. 

"Mother..." Moulin started.

"Yes, my son. Tell me anything. Please, do not hesitate." She replied instantly. She gripped the armrests of the chair with great force as she stared at the mirror.

"Do you think I am reckless and foolish to choose him over my family?" His voice sounded like a whisper, but the lady heard everything clearly. Even the faint presence of hesitation, she had perceived it. Weariness seemed to cover the youth's head like a black veil. 

"Oh, Moulin..." Lady Maxiel softened her eyes. Even until now, it seems her son still felt guilty about leaving them. If this continues, perhaps the guilt and regret would swallow him whole and devour him. The thought terrified her. 

With a comforting smile, Lady Maxiel spoke delicately, "Don't dwell too much in the past... There is nothing you should feel guilty about. Indeed, your father and I felt confused when you abruptly left with that man. But it was the right decision to make. We needed time to think through the situation as you required time to sort out your thoughts and breath. I know you didn't want to choose one of two sides. But that is alright. We all become confused and scared sometimes."

Moulin nodded with a lowered head. His lips pressed together. 

With wrinkled brows, Lady Maxiel leaned forward. "Don't worry too much, my dear. You must face your problems and fear soon. And it would better if you try and turn them into the catalyst of your strengths. And if anything goes wrong, I know you are strong enough to fight and defend."

With a faint smile gracing his lips, Moulin nodded briefly before he meets his mother's warm gaze. "Will I be able to conquer my wrongs and fears with an aching heart, mother?"

"It is your aching heart that is telling you to move your feet and lift your sword. And rise as a warrior and as my son." Lady Maxiel smiled. "I believe you can do it."

Moulin clenched his fists as he nodded with bright eyes. "Thank you, mother..."

"It is my job to guide you through your troubles." A chuckle escaped Lady Maxiel's lips. "Now tell me... Is that man bothering you in any way? I know you are capable enough to murder him in his sleep."

Moulin revealed an awkward smile, 'not strong enough yet...'

"There was... a misunderstanding," Moulin muttered and then raised his brows as he continued. "However, he is still a good man. I just think that he had somehow changed..."

Lady Maxiel narrowed her eyes. "Changed how? If he is making you uncomfortable, let me know at once."

"No, he..." Moulin scratched the back of his head as he turned away. Afterwards, a sigh fled his lips. "There are situations that make me confused. I know we all have our differences and secrets, and I will honor them. However, there are times where I feel unsettled about not knowing what thoughts are dwelling on his mind. I thought distance is perhaps a good start to calm myself and breathe. However, I cannot help but think of him..."

...

Lady Maxiel blinked during the brief silence. 

She realized how wrong she was before. It seems that her son has completely fallen. And... perhaps, it would be impossible to bring him back from the depths. 

Unable to bear it, a chuckle escaped her lips. After being startled by the sudden laugh, Moulin tilted his head as confusion filled his face. "...?"

"Ah, forgive me." His mother covered her grinning mouth with a smile. "You are just so adorable when you openly spoke of your feelings."

Moulin furrowed his brows. "Mother..."

"Haha, please, have a little laugh with your mother." She grinned with crescent eyes.

"..." 

Moulin sighed and gave a smile. "You are excused then."

"Hm, How bold of you, my dear." Bright eyes were filled with joy once she sees Moulin's smile. With a soft expression, she sighed. 

The two continued to converse until Lady Maxiel finally decided to end their communication. And before her fingers could touch the mirror, she stopped.

A crease appeared between her brows as though she was hesitating over something. This expression could not escape Moulin's eyes. So with a curious look, he asked, "Mother? Is there something you want to say?"

Lady Maxiel stopped. She opened her mouth, but no words were spoken. In the end, she clenched her hands and shook her head. 

"Tomorrow... Come and talk with me again..."

Blinkingly, Moulin smiled, "You know I am never late, mother."

Lady Maxiel felt her heart ache. She swallowed as she nodded before heading farewell and finally closing the communication. 

Before Moulin's eyes, his reflection was shown. Unaware of his mother's sorrowful expression beyond the other side.

Departing the mirror halls, Moulin opened the doors and caught two little pups obediently sitting on the ground, gazing at each other's eyes. The way they tilted their heads simultaneously in the same direction, like imitating a mirror, appeared so cute it brought a smile to Moulin's face. Together the three left the treasury halls and proceeded to return to the tower.

"...?" 

Moulin furrowed his brows before his fingertips touched the doors of his room. He glanced down at Snow and Keir who behaved as if they didn't felt anything suspicious. Shaking his head, Moulin thought that perhaps he was only overthinking. 

Creak!

The doors opened, and the warm light of the day entered his eyes. A warm atmosphere in an empty room felt soothing and relieving. Moulin let Snow and Keir run off to play together while he ambled towards the bedroom with a calm expression. 

He walked through the arched doorway, and suddenly he stopped before taking a step into the room. 

His eyes widened, and he felt himself hold his breath.

Reflected within the glossy layer of his silver pupils was a stunning glow of pure blue. Sparkling vibrantly before his eyes. 

Slowly, he stepped forward. His heart was pounding within his chest.

Sitting within a crystal vase was a gorgeous blue flower glowing ethereally. A rare magnificent flower that would glow once after hundreds of years. The only flower left to survive a dreadful fire. The first flower he had ever received when he was brought to this world.

Reaching out, Moulin slowly picked up the moonflower from the vase. He had clearly left this flower in his quarters back in the Leonile manor.

Moulin pressed his lips together when a thought entered his mind.

"Hadrian..." 

A whisper left his lips.

And Moulin stood within the empty room, unsure about what to think.