CH 83

The Grand Duke’s eyes were deep as he stared at me calmly. It was transparent and beautiful like a sparkling glass bead, but it was difficult to read.

“If you say that, I won’t offer it any more.”

Fortunately, the topic that bothered me ended up neatly. It’s frustrating and annoying to have to keep studying with Kir, but I’m happy because it seems like I’ve kept my conscience.

“If you don’t have anything else to say, can I go?”

“Yes.”

“Good-bye.”

As the Grand Duke’s permission was granted, I gave a respectful greeting and turned around. At the moment I just grabbed the office doorknob.

“Tell me if you need help someday.”

I looked back. But the Grand Duke was walking to his desk, so I couldn’t see his face. With his back to me, the Grand Duke added indifferently.

“There will come a time in life when you need help.”

He didn’t look up to me even as he sat at his office desk. I just nodded and walked out. I felt strange the whole time I walked to the carriage. It seemed to herald something so big that I needed to call the Grand Duke for help. I don’t feel like it.

No, wait. But now I’ve decided to continue studying with Kir, right? Obviously I made my own decisions, but the result was the exact opposite of what I had wanted before my interview with the Grand Duke. Somehow, I was the only one at a loss.

Have I been deceived? Did I move according to the Grand Duke’s intentions?

As I trudged through the empty hallway, I was left with a strange sense of uneasiness.

* * *

After my interview with the Grand Duke, I quietly joined Kir’s class. Now that I have made a promise with the Grand Duke, I cannot say with my mouth that I will quit class with Kir. But Kir kept watching me, not knowing that I had met the Grand Duke.

Still, at the end of class, if Kir sent a signal to Mr. Jeremy, Mr. Jeremy clumsily praised Kir. Looking closely, Mr. Jeremy seems to know the conversation between me and the Grand Duke, but I don’t know why he’s following Kir’s rhythm.

Besides, the words praising Kir were more soulless than before? Either way, it doesn’t really matter to me. On the contrary, it was better for me that Kir was mindful of me and studying passionately. If we had to continue taking classes together, it was natural for me to set the pace as soon as possible.

But at some point, this feeling turned into worry. If he couldn’t answer Mr. Jeremy’s question during class, Kir’s face was bleached white. And he would be busy staring at me trying to read my mind. The confident little boy was starting to get worried because he got discouraged

“Kir, is he still like that these days? It seems a little dangerous.”

I quietly asked Mrs. Seryl.

“He rarely gets angry. He’s been quiet these past few months. He lives with books every day.”

My heart fluttered hearing Mrs. Seryl softly whispered the answer. He seems to be busy with his studies and doesn’t even have time to get angry, but Kir’s condition seemed strangely sharp to some extent. I realized that Kir was like a time bomb in a different way from when he was childishly begging for a slap.

It felt like the kid was drying up, like someone who had a broken heart while filming a romance movie of the century. If he usually just whines, I feel that something was really repressed now? Kir’s condition gradually deteriorated. The eyes that were getting dry day by day were creepy.

On the third month after I started studying with Kir, I felt that leaving him like this would be a disaster.

“I can’t. Let’s play today!”

I came forward and declared to Kir. But Kir glanced up at me and turned his gaze back to the book without a word. This kid? I reached out and closed the book that Kir was reading. Kir looked at me like he was going to be angry, and then reached for the book again, but I snatched it.

“You have been studying great lately. It’s time to reward yourself because you worked hard.”

Kir’s eyebrows rose in dissatisfaction. The kid who was supposed to shoot bluntly was quiet. The guy who was supposed to be furious and make a fuss was quiet. He wasn’t Kir at all. Since when did Kir change like this? Why didn’t I know yet?

It was only then that I realized that I had been paying attention to Kir for a long time. I see him twice a week, but I haven’t seen him properly lately. Because Kir was always looking at the book with his head bowed.

Rather than being surprised because it had been a long time, Kir’s eyes that had changed in that short time were unfamiliar to me. Kir’s eyes, who used to gleam with enthusiasm, were as dull and dead as a person who had lost their vitality. It’s not mature. It just went dry. For a moment, my throat choked. I felt like I could hear a rattling noise from somewhere inside my body.

“If you don’t reward your studies, you’ll get tired quickly. Let’s go for tea time in the outdoor garden. Get up.”

Strangely, his throat was strangled and he could barely speak.

I just led the sullen Kir to the outdoor garden. After hearing Mrs. Seryl’s words that Kiri is only studying in his room these days, I deliberately dragged him out. I’m glad that Kir is studying hard, but I’m worried because it’ll be bad for him. Come to think of it, I had forgotten that this angel-faced boy had a demonic tenacity.