CH 25

Chapter 25: All Things Grow

Shi Yan’s extremely beautiful eyes were fixed on her. When he heard her intoxicated words, he smiled instead. Although the smile was light, it was extremely good-looking. When he smiled, it was like there were stars swirling in his eyes, and people couldn’t help being dazed by it.

She thought that the beautiful and alluring female ghost in Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio might not even be half as good as him.

Suddenly, there were bustling sounds at the entrance of the bathroom. It sounded like many people were walking in together. Ruan Zhizhi frowned and listened carefully several times. She was a little surprised to find that they were actually men’s voices. 

What was going on tonight, was everyone drinking too much? Why were so many people going to the wrong toilet?

She opened her mouth and was about to say something to Shi Yan, but she saw the other person’s brow furrow. The next second, before she could react, he came over and grabbed her. Then, almost at the same time as the movements of the crowd outside the bathroom, the people at the door came in while she was quickly pulled into one of the stalls by Shi Yan. He swiftly sat her down on the toilet.

The area in the stall was narrow. The space that could originally accommodate one person was now crammed with two people. Ruan Zhizhi was a little more sober now. She looked around and found that she had nowhere to go. Without any better option, she resigned herself to leaning against the toilet, face-to-face with Shi Yan in the cramped space.

The few people who had come in were obviously somewhat drunk. At present, they gathered together to smoke and chat, telling salacious jokes in a frivolous manner.

Ruan Zhizhi listened to them for a while and felt a little embarrassed. Just when she wanted to talk, Shi Yan extended his hand and tightly covered her mouth.

“Wu…”

With an ambiguous protest in her mouth, Shi Yan frowned. He leaned down to meet her eyes and said in a low voice, “Ruan Zhizhi, how many people do you want to know about you going into the men’s washroom incorrectly?”

Ruan Zhizhi was stunned. She blinked and finally managed to calm down.

Seeing her calm down, Shi Yan also took his hand away from her mouth. 

The atmosphere fell silent. At this moment, the two people in the stall seemed to form a completely different world from the people outside. The others were intoxicated in a dazzling world of luxury, while they lived in their small world where time stood still. 

Afraid that her consciousness was unclear and she would fall off the toilet, Shi Yan wrapped one hand loosely around her waist. He crouched down halfway, regarding Ruan Zhizhi attentively with his ink-black pupils. Then, he reached out and pulled a tissue from the side. With a very tender expression, he slowly wiped the remaining alcohol stains and filth at the corner of her lips. 

Ruan Zhizhi saw his actions, bit her lip, and tried to turn her face away. A little embarrassed, she whispered, “Don’t wipe, it’s dirty.”

Shi Yan ignored her. He reached out and turned her face back. After wiping off all the filth on her face, he gently smoothed her messy hair. “It’s not dirty, it’s very clean.”

In his heart, she had always been cleaner than anyone else.

Her heart was pounding madly and uncontrollably with his ambiguous words. Ruan Zhizhi watched him in a daze. Suddenly nervous, her fingertips trembled slightly. Immediately after, her face slowly turned red. 

Really, it was too embarrassing. How come, so long as she came across anything related to him, she would become unlike herself? Her current appearance was exactly like that of a sixteen or seventeen-year-old girl who had just experienced her first awakening of love. Where was the shadow of the mature, white-collar city woman?

After composing herself, she tried to level her tone, “Shi Yan…can I ask you a question?”

“Say it.”

Receiving the other party’s permission, Ruan Zhizhi thought deeply in her heart before continuing: “You once told me that you really, really like a girl very much. Can you tell me who she is?”

If the answer was not the one she thought, then she would give up.

It was better to get away as soon as possible than to be stuck in a quagmire with no way out.

It was hopeless to wait for someone to love you. It was too despairing. She couldn’t take it again, and she didn’t want to repeat the same tragedy twice in her life.

Shi Yan’s pupils trembled imperceptibly. He opened his mouth, his usually calm and unperturbed tone becoming a little erratic: “You really want to know?”

“Really, I really want to know.”

“Ruan Zhizhi, if you know, you can’t go back.”

His tone was very light and indifferent, yet the final syllable trembled a little, as if some kind of hidden emotion had emerged from the ground. With her seemingly non-existent encouragement, it had already spread beyond control and could only be allowed to grow frantically.

Incited by the alcohol, Ruan Zhizhi nodded without the slightest hesitation. “Say it, I won’t go back.”

Shi Yan looked at her and smiled with an expression of utmost cherishing. His features, which were always cold, seemed to be covered with a layer of gauze, hazy and tender. She was enchanted by his smile. He looked at her, then opened his mouth to speak.

At this moment, Ruan Zhizhi suddenly heard Li Sichen and Lu Wanyi’s voices outside, calling her name one after another anxiously.

Li Sichen and Lu Wanyi had reacted immediately, probably because she had disappeared for too long, making them uneasy.

Shi Yan obviously heard their voices too. He thought about it and lifted Ruan Zhizhi up from the toilet first. “Can you walk now?”

She nodded cautiously.

“There’s no one outside anymore, I’ll take you out.” As he spoke, he reached out and helped Ruan Zhizhi tidy her hair carefully. Without a second thought, he naturally crouched down and told her, “As for the question you just asked me, if you still want to know after sobering up, you can come and find me any time.”

Ruan Zhizhi, no matter how long, I will always wait for you.

Enticed by Shi Yan’s patient tone which was hard to come by, Ruan Zhizhi didn’t speak. She tried to stay calm and nodded, and was then led out of the men’s washroom by him step by step.

Recalling how she had vowed to inform Shi Yan that he had gone to the wrong bathroom, she immediately wanted to find a hole to bury herself in. 

Walking out of the men’s room, her ears were once again occupied by the DJ’s deafening music. Ruan Zhizhi wrinkled her brows. For some unknown reason, in this chaotic place of men and women, she subconsciously leaned against Shi Yan.

In her heart, Shi Yan had already become a person she could completely rely on at will.

So perhaps the situation was much worse than she expected.

As soon as the two passed through the corridor in front of the washrooms, they saw Li Sichen and Lu Wanyi with nervous expressions in the crowd.

When Lu Wanyi saw her, she almost burst into tears: “Zhizhi, where did you run off to? As soon as I sobered up, I discovered you were missing, do you know how worried I was? There are a lot of people here, what would I do if something happened, wu wu.”

Ruan Zhizhi heard the choked sobs in her voice and her heart warmed. “I’m fine, I just went to the bathroom to wash my face because I was dizzy, that’s all.” After speaking, she turned her head to see Li Sichen, who was still gasping for air. He had been running around urgently just now. She said with some guilt, “I’m sorry, I let you guys worry.”

“Zhizhi, do you know that I was scared to death when I went to the bar and couldn’t see you?” Completely ignoring Shi Yan, who was standing beside her, Li Sichen quickly walked over and grabbed Ruan Zhizhi’s shoulders with both hands. The rims of his eyes were a little red. “Promise me that you won’t make me unable to find you again, okay?”

Ruan Zhizhi lifted her head sluggishly. Studying his anxious expression, she didn’t know how to respond for a while. 

Shi Yan, who had been silent all this time on the side, suddenly laughed mockingly. “Li Sichen, if you really love her, don’t give her the chance to leave your sight, and don’t always think of looking back after missing your opportunity.” When he said this, he took an unyielding step forward and inserted himself between Li Sichen and Ruan Zhizhi, separating them. “No one will stop and wait for you forever.”

It was as if Li Sichen had just discovered the existence of Shi Yan at this moment. Since Shi Yan was half a head taller than him, he had to raise his head slightly to see the other person’s eyes. “Shi Yan, what position do you have to say these words to me? What kind of person are you to Zhizhi?” He paused. Not to be outdone, he also fired a counterattack: “Three years ago, the person Zhizhi chose was me, and three years later, it will still be me.”

Shi Yan leaned against the wall with his arms folded over his chest. His black eyes shone astonishingly bright in the room packed with lights. When he began to speak, his tone of voice was as apathetic as always: “But it’s so obvious—you can’t take care of her well, and you can’t love her more than you love yourself.”

Finishing there, he looked down at Ruan Zhizhi. His tone softened. “Zhizhi, you deserve much better.”

In an instant, as if someone had hit the nail on the head on his sore spot, Li Sichen’s shoulders shook imperceptibly. He turned his head to look at Ruan Zhizhi, who was in a daze beside him. He stretched out his hand, his eyes full of pleading. “Zhizhi, don’t listen to him. Go back with me, okay?”

His looks, actions, and voice were obviously no different from the person she had liked the most before. But now, gazing into his eyes, Ruan Zhizhi could no longer find those feelings where her heart raced in bewilderment. 

Time and space seemed to reverse back to the day of Gu Nian’s wedding at this moment.

On that day, and at that time, she had also stood between Shi Yan and Li Sichen like this, confused and at a complete loss. 

Many fleeting thoughts swept through Ruan Zhizhi’s muddled brain in a flash. In the end, they all wove together into that person’s indifferent and proud face.

She used to think he was lonely by nature, but now she realized that maybe his loneliness was all about waiting for a reunion.

She used to think that he was cold by nature, but now she realized that maybe the fire in his heart only burned for one person. 

Regardless of whether the girl he had kept in his heart for many years was her, she was unwilling to abandon him again.

The atmosphere was eerily silent, a clear-cut contrast to the enthusiastic crowd on the dance floor. Lu Wanyi wore an expression like she had gone to the wrong set, and couldn’t help but quietly watch the love triangle scene before her. 

Ruan Zhizhi pursed her lips. She was silent for a moment, then finally raised her head. She gazed at Shi Yan with a pitiful expression and issued a request: “Shi Yan…if you have time, can you take me home?”

Translator’s Note: Hahaha Li Sichen, your face must hurt. Also I imagine Lu Wanyi watching this entire exchange like O_O