Chapter 20: A colourful variegation moving to and fro

• • •

Lu Li paused for a moment, then said: “Okay.”

Xie Jianwei’s eyes lit up, pulling on his hand as he said: “The third floor’s bathroom is especially big, together we can…” 

He hadn’t finished speaking, when Lu Li declined: “I’ll just wash up on the first floor.”

Disappointment immediately filled Xie Jianwei’s face: “Is being together not okay?”

Lu Li: “It’s not okay.”

Xie Jianwei: “…”

Lu Li rubbed a little on his hair: “Be good. When you finish washing, come out and eat, and rest earlier at night.”

Xie Jianwei heard the intent within his words: “Are you going to go back?”

Lu Li said: “En, it’s quite late.”

Xie Jianwei pursed his lips, disappointment rising up within his eyes, obviously very much reluctant to see him go. 

Lu Li pretended not to see, comforting him by saying: “If you feel unwell anywhere, contact me then.” 

He turned to leave as soon as he spoke, but Xie Jianwei suddenly grabbed onto his cuff, his voice lightly quivering: ‘Doctor Lu.” 

Lu Li looked at him: “En?”

Xie Jianwei pointed to his chest: “I feel unwell here.”

Lu Li paused. 

Xie Jianwei looked up at him: “It’s very, very painful…can you not go?”

Lu Li’s chest rapidly rose once and fell, though the words coming out of him were still steady: “This place is your home.”

Xie Jianwei didn’t make a sound, only watching him like so. 

Lu Li didn’t know how he managed to loosen his grip either: “I’m not your family.”

Xie Jianwei stubbornly said: “But you’re the best person I’ve ever met.”

Lu Li laughed: “it’s only because the number of people you’ve met is too few.’ 

Xie Jianwei shook his head saying: “No, Doctor Lu, you really…”

Lu Li flicked his forehead, interrupting the topic and saying: “Hurry up and wash up. I’ll wait until you’ve finished washing to leave.”

This was in a sense yielding. Xie Jianwei still wasn’t happy, but he also couldn’t do anything about it. 

The Couple Bath couldn’t be taken [1]. If it was the real adolescent Xie Jianwei, he would probably just resign himself to it just like that, but how could Military Strategist Xie let go of such a good opportunity?

Lu Li wouldn’t come? Naturally, he had plans to make him come. 

Xie Jianwei took off his clothes and went to the bathroom. After filling the tub with hot water, he then sat by the side and started playing on his phone. 

Xie Jianwei boredly used this tiny equipment and connected himself to the worlds’ numerous secret bases, basically probing at the level of technology here, as well as the state of cultural development. 

The half-hour flashed by, and Xie Jianwei put the phone down and started taking off his clothes [2].

After taking everything off, he walked into the bath, lying down with half-closed eyes, pretending that he had fainted from soaking in the bath for too long. 

This was also very fair and reasonable. After all, his body was weak anyways. He hadn’t slept for a whole night last night, and had also spent half a day making flower vases in the afternoon with Lu Li. 

Even though when he was making the ceramics, he had been sitting there, unmoving, it wa still pretty energy consuming. It was manual work, after all – pulling and tugging, and if one wasn’t focused then the flower vase’s shape wouldn’t be good.

If it was just being physically tired then whatever, but he also had ‘heartache’ as well. Just then, at the thought that Lu Li was immediately going to leave, at the thought of the dinner that he was fed up with and the loneliness of nighttime, Xie Jianwei’s mood was, par for the course, disastrous through and through. 

Under the dual attack on both his spirit and his body, he, very logically, fainted in the bathtub. 

If Lu Li had promised to wait until after he had finished bathing to leave, then he definitely wouldn’t leave. 

And, having taken an hour to take a single bath, he would definitely feel uneasy. 

As expected, after another few minutes, from the outside came the sound of knocking on the door: “Have you washed up yet?”

Xie Jianwei heard it of course, but he had to pretend that he couldn’t. Anyways, the door hadn’t been locked.

Lu Li once again lightly called to him. Xie Jianwei was currently diligently pretending to have fainted. 

Outside, Lu Li paused for a moment. His hands were placed on the door handle, but he still didn’t dare to push it upon. 

He didn’t dare to look at a Xie Jianwei who didn’t have a single shred on him, didn’t dare to imagine the image inside, and also, didn’t dare…

But he couldn’t bear to let someone else see it either.

Xie Jianwei’s body was weak. He’d probably soaked in there for too long and fainted. Someone had to go inside to fish him out of there, and this person couldn’t be himself, and yet could also only be him. 

Lu Li knew that he shouldn’t have such filthy and corrupted desires towards someone who was younger than him by twelve years, and who was, at the same time, a young man that was so trusting towards him. 

But he couldn’t stop it. 

Since the first time walking into the residence, the first time seeing Xie Jianwei, the first time hearing his voice, his soul had pined for him, his dreams entangled by him. 

As if he had waited for him for a long time, had thought about him for a long time, and had loved him for a long time as well. 

But it had clearly been their first time meeting each other, and Xie Jianwei was only an ignorant youth, to the extent that this youth didn’t even know what love was. 

It was merely a single door, and yet it seemed to be the boundary between heaven and hell. 

Lu Li didn’t know whether it was heaven or hell that he would face if he walked in, because, in the end, he couldn’t make out just where it was that he stood right now. 

‘Ka-da.’ Came the sound.

The door was opened in the end.

The bathroom laid with intricate ceramic tiles was bright and spacious, yet the hazy steam obscured the splendour, dyeing it with sensuality. 

Inside the pure white bathtub laid the teenager, a beautiful crimson spreading on his jade-esque skin due to the steaming of the hot air. His eyes were closed, his lips as if water. His unclothed body was completely out in the open, innocent and yet bewitching. 

Lu Li sucked in a shortened breath, reaching out his hands and carrying the person out from the water. 

Xie Jianwei was unmoving, thinking in his heart: If Lu Big Li can still hold on this time, then he would accept defeat completely. 

In reality, when Lu Li had taken the person into his embrace, that shaking strand of the string called reason had utterly broken into eighteen pieces. 

He didn’t dry off Xie Jianwei’s body at all, directly placing him on the bed, lowering his body and kissing his ruddy lips. 

This was a kiss that had been secretly kept inside for a long time, containing a densely concentrated desire, fermented with boundless love. 

But even so, Lu Li’s movements were still very light, terrified of alerting the sleeping person.

Xie Jianwei was originally planning to go along with the flow and wake up, forcing Lu Li into a corner.

But now he grew soft-hearted again. 

In fact, he was faintly aware of what Lu Li was thinking. Having endured it for so long, it was no more than because he thought that Xie Jianwei was too young. Despite that his body had already developed pretty well, his psyche was still immature. 

Lu Li could easily bewitch his young man who was incomparably trusting towards himself, but he couldn’t wipe away the strong feeling of guilt. 

Of course…there was another fatal reason. 

Even if, in the settings, Xie Jianwei had a yandere nature – even if in the settings Xie Jianwei had an extremely strong desire of possessiveness towards him – at the bottom of his heart, he still didn’t believe that he would fall in love with him.

Was possessive desire love?

If he had been swapped for Doctor Chen Doctor Li Doctor Wang, would Xie Jianwei still be like this?

In the end, Doctor Lu wasn’t the one and only – he was the only one available. 

Just like when Xie Jianwei, who had landed on that destitute planet, had met only Lu Li. 

Having thought to these matters, Xie Jianwei, too, could only sigh: Lu Li this big idiot. 

But actually, he himself was also to blame. Why hadn’t he discovered Lu Li’s unease in all these years?

Indeed, Lu Li, who had been fighting this whole time, had acquired a lot – power, status, the protection of the warriors, and the adoration of tens of thousands of subjects – but, in the end, Lu Li was still Lu Li. 

He was the Lu Li on that desolate star who, when he had first learnt characters and had learnt the meaning behind his name, had disappointedly said afterwards: “Is it because I made them separate, that they gave me such a name?” [3] 

At that time, Xie Jianwei had told him: “In the ancient language, there’s a phrase that goes “[of clouds] Aggregating as it disperses and reclusters, a colourful variegation moving to and fro [4]”. The meaning of Lu Li is brightly coloured, multi-hued and magnificent.” 

[‘纷总总其离合、斑陆离 (Lu Li) 其上下’]

[离 – Li means ‘leave’] 

— like the sun, illuminating Xie Jianwei’s dark and bleak life. 

***

Lu Li’s kiss was intimate and precious. He kissed from Xie Jianwei’s pretty chin all the way to his flat abdomen, at last swallowing the delicate little thing sticking straight up. 

It was a pity that, once he had shot, Lu Li no longer continued, and instead acted as if he had suddenly woken up, about to run once again. 

Xie Jianwei made a prompt decision, dazedly mumbling: “Doctor Lu…”

His voice, which had originally been cotton-soft anyways, had become even more gentle in the lingering charm of climaxing – as if it had become fine feathers, lightly brushing on the tip of Lu Li’s heart, adding even more chaos to his already messy thoughts. 

Lu Li paused for a moment, and in the end didn’t leave. He flipped Xie Jianwei over, and acquired a short-lasting satisfaction between his thighs. 

Xie Jianwei’s heart was ticked by him so much it was hard to endure, at last using his super strong willpower to stop himself from begging him to come in. 

Afterwards, Lu Li again picked up Xie Jianwei and took a bath. 

When he put him back on the bed, Xie Jianwei finally ‘regained consciousness’ slowly. 

Lu Li once again became the well-behaved Doctor Lu. 

Xie Jianwei, happily surprised, said: “Doctor Lu, you didn’t leave!”

Lu Li said: “Next time when taking a bath, remember that the water temperature can’t be too high, your body can’t take it.”

How would Xie Jianwei care about that stuff? He pulled on Lu Li’s hand, saying: “Could you stay tonight for dinner?’

Lu Li said: “It’s not too appropriate.” 

Xie Jianwei was disappointed again: “Doctor Lu, why aren’t you my family member?”

Lu Li didn’t say a word. 

Xie Jianwei said, distressed: “How nice it would be if you were my family. I want to be with you every day, never parting forever.”

His expression when saying those words was extremely serious, at the same time especially alluring. 

Lu Li didn’t reply, only, his eyes darkened a little.

Xie Jianwei spread out his hands, and like a cat, rubbed against his palm, softly saying; “Doctor Lu, I don’t want you to go.”

Images of Xie Jianwei in the heat of his emotions instantly arose in Lu Li’s brain. He took a deep breath, drawing his hand back, lightly saying: “I should go back.”

Done speaking, he didn’t wait for Xie Jianwei to say something again, getting up and leaving. 

Xie Jianwei didn’t urge him to stay either. Just that, the corner of his lips raised slightly. You’re leaving now, but in a while, you’ll still have to come back. 

Lu Li had just walked out of the garden gates when he heard his phone making a sound. 

This was the special text message tone he had set for Xie Jianwei, so as soon as it sounded, he would know that Xie Jianwei had sent him a message. 

Lu Li took out his phone. After swiping it open, he saw the picture the young man had sent.

It was a very pretty selfie. Despite there being not a single embellishment, it was still so pretty that he couldn’t move his eyes away.

Xie Jianwei: Doctor Lu, Doctor Lu, come tomorrow okay?

Lu Li didn’t reply.

After a moment, Xie Jianwei sent a picture again. It was a picture of him dressed properly, and underneath, it was followed by a line: Does it look nice? New clothes. 

Lu Li’s heart said: Looks nice, looks too nice, looks so nice that he wants to take it off. 

And yet he still did not reply. 

But Xie Jianwei seemed as if he had found delight, sending him messages nonstop, every message attached with a photo. 

Sometimes it was his selfie, sometimes it was other stuff, as if, although Lu Li had left, it was just like he was still by Lu Li’s side. 

Lu Li didn’t look at his phone when driving, but in the first moment after stopping his car he swiped open the screen.

He had only taken a glance, and yet his heart felt a violent pang. 

The photo was of a table of overly decadent food, and following it came Xie Jianwei’s words: Really want to eat dinner together with Doctor Lu.