Chapter 182: Confusion (2)

Hearing my words, Nikaido fell deep in thought before she put a hand on top of her heart before looking up to me with a different expression than before, it's like she realized something.

"… Is that really it? But why is my heart beating like this for you? Onoda, can you tell me?"

Upon saying that, Nikaido took my hand and also put it on top of where her heart is, though there's the softness of her breast which filled up my palm instantly, her heart was really throbbing rapidly as if she ran nonstop.

"Nikaido…"

"Your words just now made it like this. What happened? This feels too different…"

Even with my hand feeling up that marshmallow-like softness on top of her heart, Nikaido with her reddened face was staring at me intently.

"Maybe it was really my curiosity earlier but now… Onoda, is this how it feels to truly like someone? Or love? I don't know but this honestly feels different than how I kept saying I like you just now."

Err… I only wanted to let her understand that she must be confusing her curiosity to like and now it turned to this.

"Haa… I don't really know what to do with you now."

Even if I was always composed, this time, I was really at a loss on what to do with her.

"Uhm then… Can I kiss you, Onoda?"

With her eyes not leaving my face and my hand still held by her on top of her heart, Nikaido drew her face nearer.

"Are you sure this is not your curiosity talking?"

I had just asked her that question earlier and she readily accepted without a second thought...

"No. This is me wanting to show how I like you..."

Nikaido shook her head and let go of her hold on my hand. Though she could feel it, she let it stay there, feeling up her slightly developed breast. The softness of it was something my palm would want to dig in anytime.

However, I took it off there once she let go of it. If that was influencing her decision then it's just the same as earlier.

"Alright. If that would let me understand what you're feeling then..."

Even before I could finish my sentence, Nikaido cupped my cheeks with her hands and pulled my face closer to her, putting her lips on top of mine.

Though she seemed clumsy at doing it, Nikaido's lips weren't hurried as it slowly savors the feeling of our lips touching. Afterwards, when she felt comfortable, her mouth opened slightly and started to push deeper, overlapping it completely with mine. Her opened eyes were already closed while her face was beet red from embarrassment. But the way she kissed me, it's really delivering something else.

Circling my arms on her waist, I pulled her closer and responded to her kiss. Nikaido's body stiffened a bit from feeling my hands slipping from her waist to her back but she let herself be pulled closer.

From a simple kiss like that, it grew deeper that her eyes opened again and seemingly smiled at me before continuing to return what I'm doing to her lips. Nikaido started sucking my lower lip while I did the same on her upper lip.

Few minutes passed by like that, alternating our kisses that her tongue sometimes peek out only to move back inside when she felt mine licking her lips. It should probably be her first kiss but Nikaido held it well.

When our lips separated, she had this dreamy look as if she's looking at someone who she could only dream of.

"As I thought. I really grew to like you now, Onoda."

Though that's kind of vague of a reasoning only after one kiss. I couldn't help but agree with her.

This girl. If earlier sounds like empty words of a curious girl wanting to try something new, this time, she put it what she's currently feeling in it.

"… It seems like it."

It's really different from earlier where she kept saying how she likes me or before about how she wanted me to steal her as well, all of those were her curiosity about the new things that we've shown her.

"I'm glad."

With an enchanting smile on her face, Nikaido spread her arms open before slipping it from my sides to put me in her embrace as she snuggled into my chest.

"I was kind of naive before. But it seems it was really idiotic to even be ready to be taken to a hotel. If it was any other guy, they wouldn't try to understand me like you do, Onoda.  I'm glad it's you."

It's not just idiotic… For her to have those thoughts… If it was any other guy, even if they're not that interested in her, to be confessed over and over how she likes them, any guy would also be inclined to think 'why not try it?'. And that would certainly lead to them having a relationship but without some kind of foundation when her curiosity was completely cleared it would crumble easily.

"I still don't get it completely, however, you should really treasure yourself Nikaido. I'm the worst guy to be involved with."

Because of my experience, I'm the kind who now treasure every girl I would be involved in. Even Mori who rejected me, I still cared about what she would feel upon seeing Ogawa and Nami happy together back then. Completely different from before, eh? However with how many I already had, I'm surely the worst guy to someone new to all this.

While still snuggled to my chest, Nikaido gently shook her head and snuggled even closer that the passing employee of the cafe smiled upon seeing us this close.

"I don't think so. If you're the worst, no one will be better. Alright. I've decided, I will make you like me too."

I don't know. She's already close to that but I won't tell her yet. It's better to let her understand her own feelings first.

"Make sure of what you feel first, okay? I really don't want you to regret it. It might look like I'm taking in anyone but all of them were already involved with me even back then."

Except for those new targets. They're really not involved with me but because of my growing fondness for them, I had this thought of making them fall for me as well.

I guess at that point, Nikaido and I were thinking the same thing. If before I was just forcing it through different circumstances, this time I was actually trying to woo them in my own way. Like Shizu-senpai, if I really wanted her to be mine as fast as possible, there's a lot of methods to be used but I chose for us to slowly bond during that secretary work.

"Un. I'll keep that in mind."

Nikaido nodded and put on a smile again. Her arm that was circled behind me moved to my face.

Nikaido caressed it with her fingers until it went on my lips that she had just kissed.

"I was curious about you. I guess that's really it. For letting me realize it, thank you Onoda. You're really as mysterious as I first thought of you."

After saying that Nikaido pulled herself up from my chest and pulled me into another kiss again.

Spending at least 20 minutes inside the cafe, we finally left it on a somewhat good note. With her still clinging to my arms, the smile she had earlier compared to now was really different. This time, it's like a maiden in love who only just had her first love bloom. The confusion she had was somehow cleared up.

Err… my confusion about what's happening and what's the deal with her was also cleared up. That Otsuka-senpai, I really need to clear her curiosity as well. I'll message her later.

In the following hour, we both had a trolley as we walked around the supermarket picking groceries that would be brought to different homes. She kept on recommending me something and I also did the same to her. It became like a supermarket date.

When we're at the counter, because of how close she was with me, the clerk thought that we're together. She's already trying to put everything in one receipt before I noticed. Good thing I was alert and stopped her but that earned us a raised eyebrows from her.

Nikaido couldn't stop giggling about it when we left the supermarket. That's her fault but she was too amused and maybe happy that the clerk thought we're a couple.

After resting a bit on the same bench where we waited for her 2 weeks ago, Nikaido bid me farewell with a satisfied smile on her face while leaving the words 'Next time I will make you admit you like me as well.'

At least that's not her curiosity towards me now. After seeing her off, I also made my way back home.

Before Aya leaves after lunch, I'm already thinking of cooking for her. Err… cooking for everyone, it's been a while that I got freed of that chore.

The time when I cook and eat with only myself was already over. The silent house was already lively enough with Akane and Miwa-nee along with our son, Minoru

The cameras I put all around the house before were already long-shelved and the recordings shelved as well. I didn't really need those anymore but I couldn't bear to delete everything. They're part of my dark history, I'll carry them all through the end. Forgetting about it wouldn't clear what I did. That's why even if there's a possibility for it to become my downfall in the future, I'll keep it shelved and away from the sight of others.