Chapter 333 Not Too Proud to Beg

Chapter 333 Not Too Proud to Beg　　If you enjoy music while you're reading, try "Stay" by 30 Seconds to Mars. It's what I was listening to while I wrote this!

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~ LHARS ~

Kyelle was in the kitchen when Lhars leaped to the porch and opened the door into her tree house. Hesitantly. He opened it hesitantly. Lhars wanted to snap at himself. He'd never done anything around Kyelle timidly. He'd never avoided talking to her. He'd never watched her from across the clearing and not approached. He'd never peered around a door looked for her, waiting to see what her reaction would be to his appearance…

She was one of his best friends, and since Zev left they'd become allies as well.

Now, outside of organizing and discussion of Alpha business, they hadn't spoken in days, and tonight she was supposed to go with Zev as part of the team to bring back Sasha and as many of the females as they could safely free. In just a few hours Kyelle would be walking into the dark surrounded by males whose priorities centered on other females, not on Kyelle. She'd be expected to handle herself like an Alpha, and a male. She had a job to do. And from the Chimeran perspective, if she died in the doing of it… that was life sometimes. She would be grieved—genuinely. Her flock would be disrupted until she was replaced.

But no one else's heart would ache with unfulfilled desire.

No one would grieve her as a mate.

Would he? Could he? Would he be allowed to? Would he allow himself? He was certain she was his One, but if they'd never mated and she died… where would that leave him? Would the darkness take him? Or would he just be... empty for this life? Hollow. 

Lhars snorted the air from his nose in disgust. Regardless of the bond, regardless of anything else, if she was gone his life would be less. Just less.

Since Zev had made the call the night before that they were definitely going—with a knowing and sympathetic glance at his brother—Lhars had been fighting the urge to go to her.

He'd intended to pull her aside after that meeting, but he'd been held up with Pack business, and when he finally turned, she'd already fled the City. Or, at least, to the part of the City where he was.

Then Zev had asked him to return to the Village, just in case the humans came through before they left.

So now it was dawn and he'd seen a light on in her tree house, which meant she was awake. And likely already preparing to leave.

She either hadn't believed him, or hadn't cared, that if something happened to her it would kill him.

The thought kept stealing his breath—like a blow to the ribs. It would take him from nowhere and he'd have to recover. Then his mind would move on. Then it would come screaming out of the dark again.

Kyelle was walking willingly into the hands of the humans. So was his brother. So were many of his friends and Chimera he admired. But somehow… somehow it was different when he thought about the danger she'd be in.

Kyelle must have smelled him, because when he paused, his head around the door, but didn't open it, she had her back to him, leaned over something on the opposite counter in the kitchen. "Come in," she said softly. "Do you have a message from Zev?"

Hearing his brother's name on her lips lit white-hot anger in his chest.

It was all just so fucking unfair.

"No, I wanted to talk to you," he muttered, walking in before she could retract the invitation.

There was a quiet intake of breath from her, but she put down the knife she'd been using and picked up a towel to wipe her hands before turning around to face him, gripping the stone counter behind her and staring at him like she was afraid of what he might say.

"Are you hungry?" she asked when he didn't speak immediately.

Lhars shook his head. Then he swallowed and looked down at his feet, blowing out a breath before he raised his chin to meet her eyes again.

"I need to tell you that it… it hurts me more that you would avoid me, than that you rejected my advance," he said, his voice low and gruff. "Apart from any… feelings I might have, you're one of my best friends Kyelle. Having you turn away from me, look at me like you're frightened… that's worse than never having you. There's so much that could go wrong tonight, or in the coming days. I don't want you to leave when we're like this. So, please… pretend I never said anything."

Kyelle blinked, her eyes a trifle wide. She shifted her weight and bit her lower lip, her eyes never leaving his. "What if I don't want to forget that you said it?"

Lhars' heart pounded, slamming faster and faster. Was she saying—?

"What if I just need some time to think?" she added carefully.

Lhars' breath came quick and shallow. She stared at him, but didn't move closer. Didn't smile.

"I… I don't understand?" He cleared his throat because his voice broke like he was reaching sexual maturity all over again. "Are you saying—?"

"I'm saying, I don't want to forget your words, Lhars. But I'm also not sure I'll ever… I don't know if I could… return your regard. I need time."

"Time like this? Where you avoid me?"

Kyelle grimaced and flipped her hair back over one shoulder. "I don't know. I don't know! I just… why didn't you ever say anything? Why wait all this time?"

"Because you were in love with my brother," he growled.

Kyelle folded her arms. "He wasn't even here for the past three years."

"And you want to try and rewrite history now and say you weren't pining for him like a stolen mate?" The words came out of his mouth far more bitterly than he'd intended. But one thing he'd always appreciated about Kyelle was that she wasn't easy to offend. She took a male at his word—but wasn't scared to call him on his bullshit whenever he proved to be full of it.

Her jaw twitched at the accusation, but she didn't deny it. "I never knew I had… other options," she said and her eyes flickered away from him, as if the admission shamed her. "I never even considered—"

"Well, that's my point," he said sadly. "It never even crossed your mind."

She pressed her lips thin and dropped her eyes to her toes. Then her eyes screwed tightly shut and she looked like she was in pain. "I just… I'm afraid that…"

He was still standing just inside the door, the whole living area and kitchen yawned between them. Seeing her face crumple like that, he twitched with the overwhelming urge to rush to her, to gather her up and try to soothe her. But what if she fled him again?

Just as he threw caution to the wind and stepped forward, the whole house began to tremble, and voices rose, calling for them.

"Kyelle! Lhars! Come quickly! They're here! The females are HERE!"