CH 89

A Man 200 Times Thicker than Normal

Translated by Mlzkzr

Edited by Mlzkzr

“Hey, hey, why are you so stubborn about not wanting to get serious, Hermes-chan?”

I was in my usual brothel, relieving my fatigue with Orthia giving me a breast pillow, when she suddenly asked me such a question.

“What’s the matter, saying that all of a sudden?”

“Because it’s bothering, you know? Even though you’re already exposed, what’s the point of hiding it?”

“Guh……”

I felt a slight thud in my chest.

I thought that I’ll be reasonably exposed…… well, I thought that I might be, but when you say it again, I feel a little sad.

Memories of all the times I’ve been careless and such came flooding back in me, and I let out a groan of “oof”.

“Hey, why?”

“That is ….. because I don’t want to get involved in troublesome things, you know. I told you that before.”

“Hmm, I’ve heard that, but”

“If it’s revealed that I’m strong, it’ll be troublesome, you know. I’ll have more things to do, more requests, and more unavoidable circumstances.”

……I thought for a moment that this was mostly the case now, but I hurriedly shook off such thought.

“Uhhmm, but well, that girl who Hermes-chan has been getting along with lately, erm… the Demon King?”

“Is it Kaori?”

“Yes, yes. Is that child really strong? Frankly, more powerful than any human being?”

“Ah”

“But it wasn’t troublesome for you, right? Rather, from what you’re saying, it sounds like you’re strong enough to throw that trouble elsewhere, right?”

“Hmm, well, I guess so.”

“So like I said”

Orthia peered into my face from above.

“Hermes, why don’t you just become the strongest and kick all that trouble to the curb?”

“……”

“It’s fine, you know, hey, be in high spirits”

Orthia stares at me from above, flippantly instigating me.

Somehow, this is…….

“Did someone ask you to do this?”

“Eh?”

“Did they give you money or something and ask you to talk me out of it? Like, per your sister or someone like that――uwah.”

The next moment after saying that, Orthia stood up without warning, and the back of my head lost the breast pillow and plunged into the bed.

It didn’t hurt, but it came out of nowhere and took me by surprise.

“Wha,what’s that all of a sudden”

“……”

“Orthia?”

Orthia stands up and looks down from directly above me.

She felt unusually angry.

“What’s the matter, all of a sudden?”

“I am a prostitute.”

“Nn?”

“I don’t take money unless I flirt with men.”

“……Ah”

Suddenly, I remembered the time right after I took over the lordship.

She said the same thing to me back then.

I tried to give her some money to thank her for her cooperation, but she refused.

“You’re terrible, Hermes-chan! I thought you knew that because we’ve known each other for a long time.”

“M,my bad”

Orthia is seriously angry.

It was a delicate word that had trampled on her pride.

“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

“……”

“Like this”

I get up, face straight at her, put my hands together and bow my head.

I bowed my head with such momentum that if she didn’t forgive me for this, I would have no choice but to get down on my knees.

After an awkward silence that lasted maybe a few dozen seconds.

“Would you really do anything?”

“Yeah, I’ll do anything!”

I looked up at her because it looked like she might forgive me, but Orthia’s face was still angry, so I bowed my head again.

“Then cooperate”

“Understood, I’ll do anything! What do you want me to do?”

“It’s almost time to decide the ranking of the most popular prostitutes.”

“Popular prostitute…… you said, is that about the one with the 『customer thickness』 competition?”

“Yes, that”

Ranking of popular prostitutes, thickness of clients.

It’s the one that shows up a lot in the various Orthia photo books which I’m always reading.

It is a competition for the popularity of famous prostitutes.

“What am I supposed to do with that? Does customer thickness mean I should just drop money here?”

I’ll give you as much as you want if that’s what it takes.

“No, it’s different. It’s, about the thickness of the customer, but it’s an old man’s gag.”

“Ha?”

“Officially, it’s a ranking of how much a customer of a prostitute can satisfy a woman.”

“Satisfy a woman――the thickness of the customer …… oooy!”

It’s an old man’s joke, or rather a dirty joke! (TN: Well, being thick is……I’ll leave it to your imagination. It means the caliber of a man being able to satisfy a woman or a number of women)

“Why would there be a ranking for that?”

“For example, suppose that your total number of customers can satisfy ten women. Isn’t it great to be a prostitute who can satisfy them? That’s what I mean. Of course, 100 people are better than 10, and 1,000 people are better than 100.”

“So that’s what that was about. ……”

I shouldn’t have known it, so I thought.

“Hermes-chan, you’re great at that too, aren’t you? Can you let me check it out and add it to my score?”

“Add?”

“Yup, I’ll add it”

“……I see”

Then …… it might be a good idea.

If it’s not just me, but me as a portion of the group, I won’t stand out if it means blending into the group.

“……my name won’t be given, right?”

“Why would the names of men be mentioned in the ranking of prostitutes? People won’t like it.”

I asked just in case, but that’s right.

“Got it, then, what should I do?”

“All you have to do is kiss me after a spell was cast on me.”

“Is that all I need to do?”

“That’s all. It can measure the possibilities and limits though, so you can’t cheat. What will you do?”

“I’ll do it. Since it’s my apology.”

“Fufu, thank you.”

Orthia broke into a happy smile, called the girl in the shop, and had her cast a spell on her, and then she kissed me.

It felt the same way as when my aristocratic power was measured before.

“How is it?”

“Let’s see…… it’s amazing! It’s 200 people”

“That…… is amazing?”

I’m a man, too, and I don’t feel bad when people say I can satisfy 200 women. (TN: LOL)

“Thanks, Hermes.”

Seeing Orthia looking so happy, I felt less and less bad.

“Fufu, I think I can win the single division with this.”

“Eh? Single?”

“Yeah. See, there’s a division for the thickness of all the customers one has, and a division for the thickness of a single customer.”

“……Hey, Orthia”

“What?”

“My name, isn’t going to be mentioned, right?”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. But everyone knows that Hermes-chan is one of my best customers, I guess. I have said that in an interview a while back”

“……Offu!”

Orthia…… what kind of mess did you do.