Chapter 469 I Asked You A Question

Peter and Myka sat awkwardly across the fire from one another.

Myka stoked the flames with a branch, adjusting the logs as they crackled and popped with the heat of the blaze.

Peter swallowed as he lifted his gaze to Myka. The golden red hues of the sky and the firelight’s radiance highlighted him in a way that made Peter’s throat dry.

He closed his eyes to avoid the temptation, but that only made the strong smokey wood smell of the campfire stronger in his nostrils. A scent that had long been burned into his senses with images of Myka’s naked flesh under the moonlight.

Moans and growls of pleasure whispered in his ear, and the taste of peppermint and honey lingered on his tongue.

Peter fought against the tantalizing memories.

“I’m sorry.” Myka sighed.

Peter’s eyes opened wide as the words brought his mind crashing into the present.

“What?” he asked, his voice cracking as it left his dry throat.

Myka ran his fingers through his hair uneasily. He licked his lips and looked away with embarrassment.

“About Alice,” he replied. “I should have been quicker to warn you she would do something like that.”

“Oh,” Peter replied. He took a breath and remembered the smile and wink Alice had given him. “Honestly, I should have known she would do something like that. She’s got a real Parent Trap vibe to her.”

Myka looked up, his brows furrowed, reminding Peter that he would not have spent much time watching movies.

“It’s a movie,” Peter commented. “Twins separated at birth by their parent’s divorce, they don’t know about each other, then meet at camp and—”

Peter glanced up, seeing Myka’s raised brow of confusion.

“Doesn’t matter. The point is mischief, shenanigans, and general hijinks. Alice, from my observation and understanding, has two modes. The first is terrifying. The second is a troublemaker.”

Myka chuckled.

“Sure, but it comes from a good place,” he smiled.

Peter nodded with a gentle smile.

“I can see that.”

Myka smiled.

They were quiet again. Peter looked away, trying his best not to stir the tempting memories that were scratching at the back of his mind.

On the other hand, Myka felt a painful grip on his heart and a weight in his chest as he tried his best to wait patiently for Peter to speak. It took a few minutes, but he could wait no longer.

“So,” he asked, keeping his eyes on his hands. “Why did you come?”

A sharp coldness fell over Peter. His heart began to race, and the air around him felt thinner. His jaw clenched, and he felt weak like he might fall over.

'',

‘Racing heartbeat, shortness of breath, dizziness, trembling, and muscle tension. This is anxiety, a mild panic attack,’ Peter whispered his self-diagnosis in his mind. He took a deep breath. ‘Breath in and out. Calm down.’

“I… wanted to talk,” he replied quietly.

Myka didn’t move. He swallowed and took a breath.

“About what?” he asked.

Peter chewed his bottom lip.

What did he want to talk about? He needed to apologize, of course. But what did he really want to say? Did he want to reject Myka again? Did he want to ask why Myka refused to confirm their bond five years ago?

Alice had told him that he and Myka owed each other an honest conversation about the past and the present. But did Peter really want that? Did Myka?

He took a deep breath through his nose and blew it out his mouth slowly.

‘Start with what you know,’ he told himself.

“I need to apologize,” Peter said softly.

Myka didn’t say anything.

Peter swallowed.

“I’m sorry, Myka,” Peter began. “The way I behaved in my office was… inexcusable.”

Peter paused, looking up at Myka, but still, he didn’t react.

“I wasn’t thinking about how you felt,” he continued. “I was only thinking about myself. I shouldn’t have assumed you would be willing to go along with whatever I wanted.”

“Is that what you wanted?” Myka asked quietly.

“What?”

Myka lifted his head, and his dark eyes gazed across the flames at Peter.

Peter felt his breath catch, his heart pound in his ears, and warmth spread quickly over him.

“Is that what you wanted, Peter?” Myka asked again. Sitting up straight, pushing his shoulders back, he tilted his head to the side. “Sex. Without affection, without warmth. Just pure physical want?”

Peter licked his lips nervously and swallowed. His chest felt heavier with each breath he took.

Myka’s eyes roamed over Peter, and he sat up straight, keeping his eyes on Peter the whole time. He stood from his place on the downed log.

Peter breathed through his nose as Myka approached, his heart racing faster and faster with each step closer.

“I asked you a question, Peter,” Myka whispered as he was only a few steps away. “Is that what you want?”

Peter still couldn’t form an answer as Myka moved to stand behind him.

Myka put his hands on Peter’s shoulders, gently squeezing them before sliding his hands down Peter’s arms and leaning so his mouth was just beside Peter’s ear.

“Tell me what you want, Peter…” he whispered.

'.',

Peter closed his eyes, feeling Myka’s hot breath tickling along his skin, his strong hands down his arms.

He could also smell the strong bitter-sweet scent of the mead on his breath.

Myka gently nuzzled his head against Peter.

“I’ve missed you….” he whispered.

Peter couldn’t help but notice how Myka’s voice was getting heavy. His words were slowing. The mead in Winter often packed a surprising punch for those that weren’t used to it.

“Myka,” Peter began, “have you been drinking?”

Myka slipped his arms across Peter’s chest, hugging him close as he nuzzled against him.

“Mmhmm,” he murmured against Peter’s shoulder.

Myka turned his head, resting against Peter’s shoulder and staring at his throat.

“That’s not all I’ve been doing….” Myka whispered, moving closer to Peter’s throat.

Peter swallowed and clenched his jaw as he tried to hold tightly to his own senses.

Myka’s soft lips pressed a gentle kiss to Peter’s throat.

“I’ve been thinking about you….” Myka whispered. “Before you got here… in the tent… I was thinking about you… a lot.”

Peter took in a shaky breath.

“I was sad,” Myka whispered. “When you acted that way in your office.”

“I’m sorry,” Peter whispered.

“But I still miss you….” Myka continued, squeezing Peter against his chest. “Why did you leave? You didn’t even say goodbye….”

Peter licked his lips.

“You didn’t want to mark each other….” Peter said through soft pants. “I was hurt.”

“I was scared….” Myka said, moving his hands down to the hem of Peter’s shirt, slipping one hand under to touch his warm skin. “You didn’t let me explain….”

Peter drew in a shaky breath at the touch. Myka pressed another soft kiss to Peter’s throat.

“Did you even miss me?” Myka asked.

Peter heard the pain in his voice, the hope. He grabbed Myka’s hand, stopping it from moving further up his shirt. He swallowed and turned to look into Myka’s eyes.

“So much more than I ever wanted to admit,” Peter whispered.

A moment passed between them, a soft vulnerability that reached into them both and began to fill the void they had left in each other’s hearts five years earlier.

Peter leaned forward and closed the distance between him and Myka.