CH 71

Filming began immediately after they moved their luggage to the dormitory. Since they were filming on the beach, Inseop had to watch the filming site, sweating profusely under the parasol.

When a photographer, known for being picky, gave instructions in English to Lee Wooyeon, he perfectly understood the instructions and changed his pose. He paused for a moment and discussed with the photographer, the coordinator ran to him to fix his make-up and adjust his dress.

Inseop approached him with a bottle of cold water a few times, but perhaps because he was concentrating on filming, Lee Wooyeon took the water and did not look towards him.

“I guess it’s true that celebrities are really born.”

Lee Dayoung, who was sitting next to him, said with a tone of admiration. Inseop, who was thinking that way whenever he saw Lee Wooyeon on set, nodded and agreed with her.

“That writer is known for being really dirty and violent. A friend of mine is an editor for a magazine, and Paul Ansel is very fussy. For now, the atmosphere is good.”

Seeing the photographer yelling at Lee Wooyeon, Inseop smiled awkwardly and nodded.

“There’s not much to do than I thought, and it’s a perfect paradise. Isn’t it?”

She sat on the sand with her shoulders back and a smile. Dayoung’s face, shining in the sunlight, looked very healthy, so she thought that Inseop was envious.

“Why is Inseop so depressed after coming to such a good place? Are you not feeling well?”

“I’m great.”

“Then what’s wrong? It’s as if you’re trying to force yourself to be depressed.”

Her words that he seemed to be forcing himself to be depressed were engraved in Inseop’s heart. It may be true.

Just looking at these dazzling and splendid landscapes made Inseop happy and excited. It felt like he was constantly looking around like a person on a trip, and his heart was infinitely excited and he was laughing out loud. Each time, Inseop suppressed himself, reminding himself that he was not a good person to enjoy these things.

“Forget about worrying for a while and just enjoy it. When will you ever come back to a place like this again in your life?”

She was an optimistic and strong person.

Choi Inseop put his envious gaze on Lee Dayoung, who had a personality that he could not have. She started telling Inseop about the must-eat foods in Hawaii. Inseop thought that he wanted to go with Lee Wooyeon, so he made a serious face and listened to her.

The coordinator, who was watching the two talk, touched Lee Wooyeon’s hair and laughed.

Lee Wooyeon, who was checking the photo work with the laptop connected to the camera, turned to the direction Inseop was sitting.

He first saw Inseop’s slender legs, which were exposed through the shorts. If he held his ankle with one hand and lifted it up and down, Choi Inseop would cry and cling to him. Then, touching his thighs and pouring out kind words, Inseop would bow his face in shame. His gaze scanned the nape of Inseop’s neck. Next, he looked at Inseop’s face, who was talking while covering the sun with his hand. Forearms, fingers, hair, earlobes, cheeks, lips. There was no place he did not look.

Just like that, he wanted to take Choi Inseop back to the hotel, take his clothes off, and fuck him all night long. He wanted to wet his insides with semen and melt them softly. He hugged him again and again, but it felt like it wasn’t enough.

<What are you thinking?>

Photographer Paul Ansel tapped Lee Wooyeon’s arm and asked.

<I’m not thinking about anything>

<Really? How about taking another picture with that expression?>

<What kind of expression was it?>

Lee Wooyeon asked with a smile.

<The hungry face of a beast waiting to bite the neck of its prey. Put away the friendly face you have now, and make a mean and ferocious face like you just did. Because that’s good.>

Lee Wooyeon nodded his head. Inseop’s vision came into view again, giving Lee Dayoung a bottle of water. At the same time, hunger cravings fluttered.

When the photographer’s signal was given, Lee Wooyeon slowly got up. His gaze was fixed on Inseop, who was sitting in the distance.

From the picky Paul Ansel, Lee Wooyeon was able to get an OK at once.

After the six-hour filming was over, people gathered their equipment and started greeting each other. Inseop got up quickly and helped clean up with the people. Lee Wooyeon was discussing today’s shooting and tomorrow’s shooting with the photographer and magazine director.

After loading all the equipment into the car, Inseop moved away from Lee Wooyeon and waited for his conversation to end.

<Shy boy.>

Paul Ansel beckoned to Inseop. Inseop turned his head and looked around, wondering if he was referring to him. However, most people withdrew with their equipment. As Inseop crouched closer to him, Paul began to speak quickly.

<Would you like to go have a drink together? I think the conversation between adults will continue.>

“The writer wants to go have a cocktail together.”

The magazine director next to him interpreted the director’s words to Inseop. Of course, Inseop, who knew immediately what that meant, blinked his eyes and turned to Lee Wooyeon.

<I’m sorry. My manager can’t drink.>

<Yeah, it seems like it. Just looking at him, it’s like taking a baby somewhere. If you want them to work hard, take them with you.>

<I will keep that in mind the next time I choose someone.>

Next time, Lee Wooyeon’s words penetrated Inseop’s heart. The end of the contract, less than a week away, was drawing nearer. Choi Inseop knew that Lee Wooyeon would not believe him. It was miraculous that his whims continued to this day.

<Then we will go there first, so please follow us.>

Paul Ansel seemed to like Lee Wooyeon quite a bit, so even though it was the first time he met him today, he showed an open attitude. Lee Wooyeon also responded with a smile. When all the staff left and only the two of them were left, Inseop asked Lee Wooyeon.

“Where can I take you?”

“You can go to the hotel first. We decided to have a drink at the bar down there. I want to take Mr. Inseop as well, but I think the air is bad because of the cigarette smoke.”

“It’s fine. I will be in my room.”

Inseop was thinking about lying in bed alone, reading a book.

“Which room will you be in? My room is on the 12th floor.”

“… … .”

Inseop bowed his burning face and replied, “I’ll be in my room.” Lee Wooyeon reached out and touched Inseop’s cheek. He said calmly, then wait there.

A fever rose rapidly in his heart. Inseop tried to pretend to be cool and moved on.

“How does it feel to travel for the first time?”

“Just, … … great.”

It really was that good. When someone talked to him, he smiled first, and he looked beautiful no matter what. And the most beautiful of them was walking in front of him.

A man who he thought could never be reached was walking at a distance he could reach with his outstretched hand. Inseop hesitated and moved his hand. With just a little bit more, he could reach him. A little bit more… … .

“What shall we do tomorrow?”

“… … !”

Inseop, surprised by Lee Wooyeon suddenly looking back, fell into the sand. Lee Wooyeon laughed for a long time at the sight of his legs twisting and falling. He thought that the third-class slapstick comedy would be better than this. Lee Wooyeon couldn’t stop laughing.

“Ha ha ha ha ha. How the hell do you fall over there?”

“… … yeah.”

Inseop procrastinated, got up and brushed the sand off his pants. Lee Wooyeon, who was happily watching the scene, suddenly held out his hand.

“I’ll hold you.”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s better than falling.”

“… … No. It’s fine.”

Even in the night sea where there were no people, they could be noticed by someone. Most of all, this was a travel destination, so if Lee Wooyeon did a little bit well, Inseop would be so excited that his toes wouldn’t touch the ground at all. At times like this, he had to make up his mind. It was a useless reason for rejecting Lee Wooyeon’s hand, which he wanted to hold.

Inseop did not see the smile on Lee Wooyeon’s face.

“Is it better to fall than to take my hand?”

“… … I think that would be good.”

He’d rather just leave it that way. Inseop answered by hiding his palms, which had become sticky with sand, and rubbing them over his clothes.

“I’ll take care of it. Don’t mind it.”

Lee Wooyeon’s undeserved kindness made him think that he shouldn’t have it. He wanted that person to like him too. and… he wondered if he will like him. He had these types of absurd thoughts.

Inseop deliberately responded bluntly and walked ahead. Lee Wooyeon, who was standing behind him, exhaled slowly.

“Are you doing this on purpose?”

“What?”

“Are you deliberately dragging yourself out of your senses, and then making me feel like an ass? Is this how you get back at me because of that bitch Jennie or something?”

“Don’t say that about Jenny.”

Inseop, angered by the sudden insult to  Jenny, responded.

“Why? What should I say then? I’m suffering this way because of a bitch I can’t even remember.”

“What kind of… … forget it.”

Choi Inseop started walking. Lee Wooyeon grabbed his arm.

“Jennie will love it too. Because instead of her, her best friend spreads his legs and gets stuck by me. She will be happy to see it in heaven. So, don’t pretend to do it for her, and don’t be pretentious.”

“She is dead. You shouldn’t say that about a dead person.”

“You’re being dragged around by a dead person’s wish.”

“Don’t talk like that!”

A blue light flashed around Lee Wooyeon’s eyes. And at that moment, he grabbed Inseop’s wrist. A thin wrist was held in one hand. It was the hand that he wanted to twist while watching him talking with Dayoung throughout the filming. Lee Wooyeon grabbed the hand that Choi Inseop himself never gave up first.

What is this? What’s so great about this?

It was something that could be easily broken, taken, or thrown away at any time. Even holding it in his hand, he didn’t feel comfortable. Rather, he was afraid that he would lose it, or that he would never be able to find it again, so his anxiety grew.

When Lee Wooyeon put strength in his hand, Inseop’s face became pale and he screamed in pain.

He felt dirty. It felt like he had become a foolish person who didn’t know what to do. He looked like a maggot wriggling in the trash. He was so annoyed that he was helpless. He terribly hated the feeling of being controlled by Choi Inseop.

“Ah, it hurts… … .”

Tears fell from Inseop’s eyes and his body trembled with pain, and Lee Wooyeon released his hand. On the sandy floor, Inseop grabbed his wrist and sat down on the spot and started crying. Lee Wooyeon looked down at the figure, covered in saliva, tears, and runny nose, with cold eyes. He felt even worse than before.

Fuck.

When Lee Wooyeon mumbled, Inseop was startled and trembled. A cruel feeling made his blood boil. It would have been better to live with only the cruel feelings that were rotten black.

Lee Wooyeon laughed softly.

Every time he looked into Inseop’s big eyes, he smiled. That tickling laugh seems to have made his head go crazy. All of a sudden, wherever he looked, Choi Inseop stood there, with his pale eyes as if he were about to cry. He was so affectionate and beautiful that he held out his hand when he came to his senses.

Whether to laugh or get angry, Lee Wooyeon didn’t know. It felt like he was back in his fucking childhood when he couldn’t understand people’s emotions and didn’t know what to look like.

He looked at Inseop with a blank expression that had lost his emotions and reached out to Inseop. Inseop sighed and shivered. Lee Wooyeon grabbed Inseop like that and made him stand up and kissed him. Surprised, Inseop tried to push him away, but the more he did it, the more tenaciously he dug into Inseop’s mouth.

He wanted more, more, more, but he didn’t know how to get it, so he was angry.

Their lips parted, and Lee Wooyeon’s cold voice came out through the gap.

“Do you like me?”

“… … .”

“Do you like a fucking asshole like me? Choi Inseop.”

Inseop didn’t answer anything. He shook his head and couldn’t even raise his head.

Lee Wooyeon, who stood silently for a long time, disappeared leaving Inseop.

Returning to the room, Inseop took off his clothes and took a shower. It seemed that the tiredness had gone away to some extent when he relaxed his body with lukewarm water. But the sad feeling was still there. When he checked it in the mirror, a large man’s handprint was clearly visible on my hand. The pain every time he moved will be more tomorrow morning.

“I’m going to bruise… … .”

He stopped muttering and burst into tears.

Lee Wooyeon was a much worse person than he thought. There were moments when he shuddered to realize it even if he didn’t want it. Just like today.

However, on the contrary, he also showed an unexpected kindness. 

Why did that person suddenly call his name in a friendly voice? Why did he hold him in his arms every night and try to sleep? Why was he kissing him, why was he holding him, why did he give him a present and hold his hand? Why? Why… … Why does he like that person?

Inseop took water and wiped his wrist. Even after rubbing with force, the handprints did not disappear. It looked like a trace Lee Wooyeon left in his heart. Inseop applied force and wiped it as if he was trying to forcibly tear off the marks.

He had a wound on his wrist, and every time the water touched it, a stinging pain spread. Inseop lowered his hand helplessly. The more he tried to remove it forcibly, the more clearly the marks were positioned.

He came out of the bathroom and sat on the edge of the bed, sniffling for a while. When there were no more tears to come out, Choi Inseop stood up.

He wanted to call home. Like everyone else, he wanted to be consoled while whining like a baby. He shoved the coins into his pocket.

He put a thin jumper over him and zipped it up so that the scar left on his wrist was not visible. Then someone knocked on his door.

Please wait.

It was at the same time that the man’s voice whispered in his ear came to mind.

What should he do if Lee Wooyeon comes? Would he be angry he went back? Or should he say sorry for not holding his hand earlier? … … What expression should he make?

The fingertips holding the doorknob trembled. Inseop took a deep breath and opened the door.