CH 47

I pushed past the broken door and stepped inside. It was a little dark inside because of the frosted windows.

But that didn’t mean I couldn’t see.

I turned and looked around the house.

The small cabin was furnished with an old bed, a table, and a fireplace.

My curiosity was piqued at the thought that this was where Liel had lived when I didn’t know him.

He took a candle and a match from his pocket, lit it, and set it down carefully on the table, then walked over to the fireplace to see if there was any kindling left.

I crept up beside him and watched his movements.

He deftly tossed the kindling into the fireplace, followed by the match that ignited the fire.

Despite his carelessness, the fire roared to life, illuminating the surroundings.

My naturally frozen body melted.

“Sit here.”

He took off his cloak and laid it on the ground. I did the same, slipping the shawl off my shoulders and letting it fall to the floor.

“You sit here too.”

I said, plopping down on the cloak first, and he blinked, then let out a smile.

Stop smiling and sit down!

When I added that I would sit on the bare floor if he didn’t sit down, he, who hesitated for a while, then sat on my shawl carefully.

He looked awkward as he squirmed this way and that.

“Is it soft?”

I joked to Liel, hoping to break the chill in the air, and he let out a small chuckle at my comment.

“Thanks for your thoughtfulness.”

Liel responded without losing.

I could hear snow falling against the window. By now, Liel’s eyes were closed.

I held my breath and watched from his side.

He looked lost in thought.

I wondered if he was reminiscing about this place where he lived with his mother.

Normally, Liel would tell me his secrets, but he rarely talked about his mother.

Even the occasional reminiscences of his mother had ceased after he entered the Academy.

So even when he wakes up, he won’t tell me about her.

But that was okay.

I didn’t particularly want to dig into Liel’s memories either.

If I could just fill in the gaps while he reminisced, that was all that mattered.

***

In his memories, his mother always seemed to be on edge, like she was being chased by someone.

She never stayed in the same place for more than three months, and she was always moving.

But at the time, Liel didn’t see anything strange about Arinel’s behavior.

He was too young for that. He was barely old enough to hold his mother’s hand and keep pace with her.

But time passed and he was old enough to be curious about the world.

Curious to know what Arinel prayed for every day, he asked.

“Mother, what is God?”

Arinel, clasping her hands together in prayer, answered without opening her eyes.

“……He is the creator who gave birth to us.”

At that, Liel shook his head and retorted.

“I thought it was my mother who gave birth to me?”

Still smiling, Arinel turned her head to answer her son.

“Because God created us, I was able to give birth to you.”

Arinel was always this way.

For her, God was an absolute, and she spoke as if only by believing and following him would their lives be saved and happy.

In response, Liel began to have doubts.

His mother was as devout a believer as anyone, but she never seemed happy when she prayed.

“Forgive us our sins. Forgive my foolishness, and have mercy on this lamb.”

What have we done, he wondered, to deserve such an apology from his mother?

As he listened to his mother pray, Liel paused to look out the window at the night breeze.

And for the first time that day, he saw what they’re being chased by.

An eerie figure stood in the dark woods, wearing full black armor.

In response, Liel hastily turned his head away from the window and thought to himself.

I should pray like my mother. If only God would forgive me for my misdeeds, I wouldn’t have to run from them anymore.

But before he could think of anything else, the two of them had to pack up again at first light. There was always contempt in Arinel’s eyes as she packed.

It would happen again and again.

Whatever the Black Knight’s identity is, it continued to pursue them, and each time, Arinel would move from place to place as if on the run.

***

“Hey, I heard your mom was crazy?”

Children’s innocence was sometimes cruel.

Once, while her mother was away, a brown-haired boy came up to Liel, who was raking leaves outside.

Liel narrowed his eyes and thought for a moment.

What the hell is this?

“What’s that?”

“Your mom.”

“……?”

Apparently not amused by Liel’s reaction, the child soon left.

He stood there for a moment, dumbfounded, staring at the fallen leaves and scratching his head.

A strong hand on his shoulder brought him back to reality.

“I said you shouldn’t be wandering around alone!”

Liel looked up and saw his mother, her complexion even paler than before.

Her brilliant blue hair, the color of the sky, was as dry as straw, and her blue eyes, once as brilliant as the sea, no longer held a ripple.

Despite Arinel’s daily prayers, their sins had not been forgiven, and they were still being hunted.

“Let’s go. They could come for you at any moment.”

Liel thought as he was dragged obediently by Arinel’s hand.

What does it mean to be crazy?

He didn’t know exactly what that meant, but he didn’t really care.

No matter what anyone says, Arinel loves him.

The fact that she always came to him and protected him was enough for him to believe that her love was valid.

“Pull up your pants.”

Arinel shouted as soon as they got back to the house, a procedure that was mandatory whenever they went outside.

“Quickly!”

Frustrated with the movements of Liel, Arinel yelled again, until Liel squirmed on the floor and pulled up his pants.

A small snake tattoo was revealed on his ankle, writhing.

“Ah, why, why won’t it go away……!”

Like a madman, Arinel began to rub his tattooed ankle furiously until Liel’s flesh was sore.

The pain radiating from his ankle made Liel bite his lip and grit his teeth against the pain.

“God, please…….”

Arinel gasped and covered her face with her hands, sobbing.

She always cried for Liel. Whenever she did, Liel would wipe away her tears and say, “Mother, don’t cry.”

Mother, don’t cry, it’s my fault.

Not knowing what he had done wrong, he would ask her for forgiveness.

And she would always shake her head.

It’s not your fault.

That day she repented to the gods from dawn till dusk, and Liel stayed by her side and slept soundly all night.

***

As the days passed, Arinel slept longer and longer. Even when she ate, she lost weight and coughed more often.

As Arinel’s body grew thin, she worried more about Liel, who was crying next to her, than about herself.

Then one day, long after he had fallen asleep, exhausted from crying, he felt something he had never felt before.

An intense pain, the likes of which he had never felt before, flooded his head.

Unable to bear the pain, Liel opened his eyes and immediately saw Arinel clutching his head, tears streaming down her face.

“Mother, mother, it hurts……, let me go, it hurts!”

His voice, unable to scream, became a sob. Liel grabbed Arinel’s skinny wrist and struggled.

Arinel did not loosen her grip, not even when she heard her child moan in pain.

“Liel, my dear son, my child……. This mother can no longer protect you…….”

Tears pooled in Arinel’s eyes, rolled down her sunken cheeks, and spilled over onto Liel’s cheeks.

“Alas, my poor boy, when I die, you will be alone in this world.”

Arinel’s voice rang in Liel’s ears even as he struggled to escape the pain.

“Remember my words, Liel.”

From Arinel’s hand came a beam of light, stronger than before, which quickly enveloped Liel’s head and began to darken his hair.

“There is no one on your side but me. Close your eyes, close your mouth, and don’t trust anyone.”

Liel’s nails scratched Arinel’s wrist. The child’s nails left marks on her white wrist. Still, she didn’t let go.

“Even if it is a human who reaches out to you, you must not tell them of the ugly sin on your ankle.”

All the while, the light continues to run through Liel’s hair and into his scalp.

“Even the gods will not forgive our sins. But even so…….”

It wasn’t long before all of Liel’s gray hair had turned black.

“Please live, please live with the sins of your mother who even the gods have turned their back on, and please live away from the evil that seeks to harm you.”

With that, Arinel removed her hands from Liel’s hair.

Liel, finally free of her torment, groaned and clutched his head.

BANG!

The old door collapsed with a loud crash, shaking the house.

Arinel’s head snapped toward the door at the sound. 

Black hair tangled between her fingers.

“You’ve been hiding here.”

A dismal voice echoed through the dilapidated cabin.