Chapter 237 Half Confession

Lexie certainly had emotions for Isiah, she knew that Isiah was never going to listen to her or even try to justify what she was doing.

He slept outside even though he felt cold just to not be there with them and to protect them at the same time, Ciel's safety was the most important thing there and he was not going to do anything to jeopardize it.

He heard a faint whisper in the middle of that storm, he recognized her voice immediately,  it was the same thing that happened in the middle of that attack in those triple full moons.

However, Isiah didn't want to intervene with her, he was capable of tracking her energy as she was walking inside that forest yet he stood still the whole time .

Lexie only wanted to protect him on a night like this, even when she knew that he was stronger than her.

"Isiah…please…where are you ?" She said again while trembling, she even fell on the ground that was covered with snow.

Isiah thought that she might get bored and tired of him and that she was going to go back inside that house, yet she didn't.

Lexie kept searching for Isiah that whole time ..

Isiah was far away from the house inside the forest, he kept tracking her movements the whole time until he got tired of her and wanted to send her back.

He walked towards her with angry expression, he was capable of seeing her in the dark however Lexie was blinded by the snow and darkness.

"What are you doing here?" He shouted at her .

When she heard him, Lexie felt very scared because Isiah looked and sounded very angry yet she was grateful that she found him finally after a long time of searching in vain.

" It is cold, this white ash is harmful …." She lost all her power to talk to him.

" Go back to sleep"  He said firmly when he noticed that she was trying to collect her power to talk to him.

" I am going to, I just want to make sure that you are safe in the middle of this chaos" She said

Isiah gave her a deadly look and then said :" Safe ? "

He left his question hanging there, he wasn't waiting for an answer and he didn't want to talk to her more than he did .

He turned around and wanted to continue walking away when she said:" I know that you hate me ,I know that you can't stand talking to me, I hated you, I hated you for a long time because a lot of things, I can't say that I am better than anyone,  I am just like everyone, I am too corrupted and disgusting just like them, however, don't push me away.."

Lexie stopped talking when she realized that she was technically begging him to keep her close to him.

" The audacity you have, listen to me, these tricks don't work on me so stay away"  He replied to her but that was just like a threat.

Lexie thought something might change now that they leveled up but apparently Isiah stayed just like he was before.

" Yes, I should be ashamed, " She replied while covering her face with her hands.

She never talked to a boy that way, she never felt that brutal attraction toward a boy like she did with Isiah, yet, when that happened she never interpreted it as love, she just kept pushing away that feeling even when he was about to die …

"Give me a chance " She said to him while closing her eyes.

Lexie knew that she was not appealing, she looked like boys , wore their clothes,  and fought like them, she never had any feminine aspect her whole life.

" How dare you ?" Isiah yelled, he was very angry now .

"Give me a chance, "  She repeated .

Isiah couldn't even look at her the same way she couldn't just look at him.

Lexie closed her eyes and then kept repeating:" Give me a chance "

She said it multiple times, and each time Isiah got closer to her while she stood still.

He grabbed her neck with his hand to make her very close to him , she was so small and fragile compared to him however she didn't break because she was closing her eyes.

She felt his strong hand as it was pressing her neck, she tried not to panic because she already experienced that so many times from him.

"Give me a chance " She whispered, not that she couldn't talk.

Isiah was biting his lower lip while looking at her from above then said:" How dare you ask me for another chance?"

She didn't reply to him, he leaned towards her this time then said:" Do you think that I would give you a second chance? Never, not in a million years, I will never give anyone a second chance, and certainly not to someone who watched me as I was dying and enjoyed that show, you , you girl, lost every fuc***ing possible chance at that moment,  there is no way you could atone for that"

Isiah yelled at her after that and said:" Open your fuc***ing eyes"

She was not looking at him for the whole time, however when he yelled at her she looked at him with a lot of fear in her eyes, Isiah felt her heart beating fast when he was strangling her with his hand , and he knew that she was so scared of him but he didn't do a thing about that..

He wanted her to stay that way .

" The day …I took your hand and I asked you to play with us , you pushed me , you looked at me with disgust, I wanted to be next to you and play with you , just like I did with my friends, however, you pushed me, "

She was having a lot of difficulty speaking, yet she continued doing that while Isiah was so pissed that she was talking about a past that he never wanted to hear about.

"When I asked my mom about you later that day, she told me about the whole story "

Isiah pressed more on her neck and then said:" Stop talking"

When she felt that she touched a tough area she just had some courage to continue and said:" Isiah, I became a rebel after that, when I knew that I can't approach you I started doing what was on my mind…I did only what I wanted "

Isiah smirked while saying:" And that is why you stood there while watching me die"

He was being sarcastic, and she started to cry, she was having a breakdown in front of him as she said: " Isiah, I hated you over the years, I hated the fact that I couldn't remove you from my head, I wanted you to disappear from my life, I even tried to disappear from your life by leveling up but  failed"

Isiah was pissed because she was trying to justify what she did .

" I saw you  smiling and being arrogant while they were trying to kill you…Isiah…you were acting very …"

Lexie stopped talking when Isiah said to her this time:" You think I deserved that?"

It was clear that she meant that, Isiah pushed her onto the ground while he was still strangling her , he was on top of her while leaning his head towards her then said:" Listen to me, you will never be close to me, I can't stand you  and I want you to disappear, no , no , I want to kill you by my hands, there is no need for your tricks, don't act like you care when clearly you want me to be dead"

Lexie kept her eyes closed as she kept hearing all those hard truths, she rested her head on the ground and waited till he finished talking then said:" I am offering something different, I am offering my emotions, Isiah, I…"

" Don't say it, you want to say that you ..you care about me ?" Isiah said sarcastically.

However Lexie felt so tired that until now Isiah couldn't interpret what she was saying.

" Yes ,I care about you"

"Why? "He replied firmly.

"I feel like we are connected "

"Why?"

" Can you stop questioning me ?"

Isiah forced her to look at him by raising her chin towards him then said:" You are  a liar and manipulative girl, there is no fuc***ng connection and there is certainly no fuc***ing emotions, you only want to be with me because you think I am strong, you saw what I was capable of, you realized that in a middle of a war you better be with a strong party…that's all"

She was shivering because of the snow and the cold weather and the feeling of being trapped between Isiah's arms gave her a hard time to even moving.

Her lips were turning blue and her skin was freezing when she heard him say:" I want to kill you, wait for your time .

"Isiah…it is cold "

She sighed because she felt like she couldn't breathe.

" If you die now, I would be grateful"