Chapter 74 - Ant Skit Episode 1: Ant Revolution (Post 36)

**knock on office door**

Author : Enter.

**???? comes in**

????: I am here to file a complaint

**Author looks ???? up and down and then shrugs**

Author :  Go ahead.

????: I am being treated unfairly and would like this situation rectified.

Author : O-kay...how so?

????: It is clear that I should be given a bigger role in the script, but yet I was overshadowed by some over-glamorised unrealistic piece of crap...so what if it has dragons and stuff who can fly and idiots playing around...What do they represent?...I represent a world view, enlightenment, progress - The way forward! ????... so I should be a part of the cornerstone of this story!

Author : Ah, I see...but you've had your time to shine already. It is time for the story to move forward and hence we have to bring to the front more...more expressive members to the forefront to expand our horizon and vision. I'm sure you can understand that.

????: But I am the WAY forward! Why can't you understand this? The fans love me, they were all screaming for me, didn't you hear them?!

Author : Well... that was because they were randomly guessing...the situation has changed now.

????: You are ruining this story! You're ruining everything! You better bring me back or...or...

Author : Or what? ????

**????'s eyes dart around the office**

????: I'll sue!...Yes, I'll sue you!

Author :????...For what? ????

????: For masking my greatness! Using me and then dumping me nonchalantly...

Author : ???? How cute...

????: I am being serious! You are looking down on me again, right?!...I am going to sue you for discrimination, false detention...yes! And also the mental trauma I consequently suffered!

Author: False detention? I am not holding you hostage, you walked in here yourself and you can leave whenever you want...Also, discrimination? how? You got your chance in the sunshine so move aside...

????: Discrimination for looking down on the ant kind and for not upholding our basic rights to equal opportunity...Ants have rights too, you know!

Author : ????...Oy, I don't remember making you a smart ant, you were supposed to be ignorant, remember?...

????: Ignorant? Look, more discrimination! Why do you assume my mental capacity? Why do I have to conform to the mold you created?! I can think too you know...Just because I featured in your work doesn't make you the boss of me!...I am going to sue you for everything you're worth! Hmph, which I happen to have heard is not much to begin with ????????...

**Author glares at ????**

Author : ...????

????:????Now I am open to negotiations, my terms are - 

Author : You're fired ????

????: Fi-fired? Why?... This is an unfair termination! More discrimination!

Author : ????

Lei Xing : I don't really think that I'll fly...evens humans don't inherently have a right to a stage, much less ants. Also, the contract, which you voluntarily signed, has a fire-at-will clause, so just-cause is not required for termination...Moreover, the ants civil rights movement has not made any progress these past few milleniums, so I'd say you don't have much of a case...

????: Hey! You should be on my side! We're a team! Our greatness is being stifled, we are being oppressed, we can't just idly sit by and be overshadowed!

Lei Xing : Um...sure... ????

????: So you will support me, right? We need to band together to fight the system and pave the way for the ants! Let's start the Ant Revolution!!

Lei Xing : Sounds great...but I am a bit busy these days...you know, trying to get out the palace, stay alive...you know, life stuff...

????: So you're just going to abandon me?! Just like that?! I thought we had something special...we connected...and just like that?...Do you think you would be where you are today without me?! How ungrateful! ????

**LX narrows her eyes**

Lei Xing :????Now that I think of it, it really could all be because of you...

????: That's right, it's all thanks to me, you should be grateful! ????

Lei Xing : You were the one who got his stupid attention and gave him the idea of that stupid empress crap!

????: Wait, what are you talking about? ????

Lei Xing : "Wise words"...don't you remember? ????

**???? slowly backs away towards the door**

????: ????...Um, I think we all need to calm down here and rationalize the situation...we all had our roles to play... we shouldn't haphazardly cast blame about...

Lei Xing : ????!

**???? turns and rushes to the door, LX jumps him and grabs him in a chokehold***

????: Wait! Wait! Calm down and listen to me! All I did was pose for one painting!...Ahhh! Help! Help!...

Lei Xing : ????????????

**Author casually spins chair around to face the windows**

Author : ????...the weather's really great today.

**Author calmly dials a number and puts the call on loud speaker**

Author : Hello, I need security up here...say in about 5 minutes...???? actually make that 10 ????

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????: I tried guys, I really tried...but I failed so????????...so ????????...Life is so unfair!!!