Chapter 336 - Unrequited Love

“You…you want me to give you a…” After being stunned, Jian Xubai laughed in the extreme anger, looked at Beautiful Lady Nuan and said in a cold voice, “When your father threatened my life in Wuhuan, I hadn’t even relented to marry you. I thought you should have understood in all these years that I had no intention for you! How can you say such things today?”

The favor Beautiful Lady Nuan asked Jian Xubai to do, to help her escape her fate of being sent to the temporary palace to stay until her death after the death of Emperor Xianjia, was not to plead with Empress Dowager, Empress or Crown Prince, but, to give her a child!

After all, according to the current rules, a concubine without a child must be sent to the temporary palace and stay there for the rest of her life unless she was granted permission not to do so.

But concubines with children, no matter what status they had or whether they were favored, could stay. If their children had already started a family, they could leave the palace after the state mourning was over and met their children. If their children were still young, they could stay beside the palace of Empress Dowager or Emperor’s grandmother until their children were old enough to start a family, and then be reunited with their children.

This was the best way for those who did not want to end up in the temporary palace, purely from the perspective of the aim.

Emperor Xianjia had never indulged Beautiful Lady Nuan, but he had kept her close to him for the past two years, and this was known both inside and outside. Emperor’s health had been deteriorating over the past two years, otherwise Beautiful Lady Nuan would not have been quiet after her miscarriage.

If Jian Xubai agreed to her request and took advantage of the current chaos inside and outside to have an affair with her, then when she was found to be pregnant at the temporary palace, she would be able to claim Emperor Xianjia responsible for her pregnancy, which might not be impossible to muddle through.

After all, since Prince of Zhao was given away last year and became Prince of Su, Empress Su was so disheartened that she did not care much about the affairs inside the palace, not to mention asking about the historian’s records.

In this case, there was room to make an issue of it.

After all, Crown Prince would become the new Emperor at that time. Even if Beautiful Lady Nuan gave birth to a son with unparalleled qualifications, she would not threaten him. And treating his concubine mother and half-brother or half-sister well would make the new ruler’s reputation for virtue. Why would Crown Prince take efforts to investigate whether this half-brother or half-sister belonged to the imperial family?

Yet how could Jian Xubai agree to such a ridiculous request?

“If you really had no feelings for me, why would you have helped me in the first place?” Beautiful Lady Nuan had obviously made up her mind to sink her sword today, and she shed tears without giving in, “That night last year when His Majesty woke up, if it wasn’t for you, I would have died long ago, right? You were willing to take such a risk to help me. But now you say you have no intention for me. What exactly am I to you?”

Jian Xubai laughed out of rage, “Did you not know whether the fact was that I saved you that night or that Emperor deliberately spared you? Beautiful Lady Nuan, you and I have known each other since we were young, so we are acquaintances, but just acquaintances! I’ll help you with some easy things. But if I have to pay a huge price and risk my future, my wife and daughter to help you, then you must be dreaming!”

His gaze grew cold and he said in a chilling voice, “You are still young and suddenly hit by such a change as Emperor died, so it is understandable that you are confused and make a mistake. This time, I’ll pretend that I didn’t hear anything! If this happens again, don’t blame me for ignoring the acquaintance with you!”

“You answer my last question!” Beautiful Lady Nuan watched in disbelief as he walked past her without a second thought, tears filling her eyes as she murmured, “What was so good about her?”

Although she didn’t mention the name, Jian Xubai understood that by “her”, she was referring to his wife, Song Yixiao. He could not help but snicker, “What is wrong with my wife?”

“She’s not as beautiful as me.” Beautiful Lady Nuan tilted her head slightly, her teary eyes were hazy as she looked at him, with a deep sense of disbelief between her brows, “And she’s ruthless. How did the side concubine that Crown Prince had abandoned die? I was there, outside, and I heard it clearly! I had planned to go there to talk to her, but I didn’t expect to see her true face accidentally! Xubai, I don’t think you can be tricked by that kind of woman since you have rejected me. But as far as I know, Madam Song has no beauty and no extraordinary family. So why do you treat her so well? Even in this forbidden city, everyone knows that you two are in harmony!”

“What does this have to do with you?” Jian Xubai was impatient to talk with her, and had already summoned Ji Su to his front, intending to leave.

But Beautiful Lady Nuan laughed coldly and raised her chin slightly, “Do you still not understand what I mean, Xubai? I personally heard your wife talking to the side concubine that Crown Prince had abandoned! That Cui Jianlian was a great favorite of Crown Prince, oh, who is soon to be the new ruler, when she was alive. And she was the legitimate niece of Noble Consort Cui! We both know the truth of Noble Consort Cui’s death, but the new ruler doesn’t know anything about it. If I go and tell the new ruler that Cui Jianlian died in vain and that Noble Consort Cui was also…”

“You want to die?” Jian Xubai stood still, not hiding the murderous intent as he looked at her!

“Instead of being sent to the temporary palace, I’d rather drag your family down before I die!” Beautiful Lady Nuan looked at him with tear-stained face and hatred, her tone mocking, “After all, once I get there and the door is locked, unless I die, I will never be able to step out again! You have said that I am still young!”

She said in a hysterical voice, “This year, I’m only seventeen! Why should I have to go to that place and wait for death?”

Seeing that Jian Xubai’s gaze was unmoved, Beautiful Lady Nuan exhaled, raised her sleeve to wipe her tears, and sneered, “Blame it on the hope you gave me! When I was in Wuhuan, my father threatened you with decapitation, but you refused to marry me. I’ve given up on you ever since! But I didn’t expect that after my miscarriage, you would ask Madam Song to send me things. And, later, when Madam Song entered the palace and my maid happened to discover that she was actually a virgin, I thought you didn’t like her…”

At this point, she forced herself to choke back a sob and laughed at herself, “I enquired about her origins. She was not exactly noble, and not loved by her father’s family! I doubted why you married her in your position? She was nothing more than that! Was it true that you actually liked me, but my father’s attitude in discussing the marriage with you was not good enough, and this aroused your arrogance as a member of a noble family in Great Rui? Otherwise, everyone knew that you had chosen Madam Song yourself, but why didn’t you touch her?”

“It was only after that that I defected to Empress and began to compete for favor…”

Beautiful Lady Nuan said despondently, “Who would have thought that when I was trying to please Empress Xianjia, I heard that she was pregnant! Do you know how sad I was at that time? But I still found many reasons for you. The Jian Family didn’t have many descendants, so maybe you just needed a legitimate son. Or maybe Madam Song had set you up by some means. Maybe you…took her for me…”

“You really think that you have always thought of me?” Jian Xubai could not bear to hear this, coldly snickered and interrupted her, “You just think that after your country was broken and you left it, you felt uneasy to live alone as a concubine of my uncle’s, so you used me as a cover!”

He said sternly, “If you had given up on me when you were in Wuhuan, why did you think of me easily when you arrived in Great Rui? And yet you didn’t even mention your biological parents? Do you still want to deceive yourself and others now? You just need a reason to live in peace in the palace of Great Rui. So, you think you adore me and are living cowardly for my sake, but in reality you are just afraid to admit that you are scared of death!”

Beautiful Lady Nuan looked at him with her mouth open for a long time before she exhaled softly and said, “So that’s what you think of me!”

She did not retort, but only demanded stubbornly, “You still haven’t answered me. Why did you refuse me in the first place, and then come back and initiatively marry Madam Song, who was inferior to me?”

“You think you are superior to my wife in every way, but only because you are conceited of your stunning beauty.” Jian Xubai narrowed his eyes and gave a sarcastic smile, “But since you entered the palace, Uncle has certainly ordered you to serve him from time to time, but has he ever obeyed your words? You are indeed very beautiful, Beautiful Lady Nuan. But not everyone is willing to fall under your beauty. Uncle liked your beauty but was not swayed by you, which could be taken as an example. Should I rightly fall for you?”

Beautiful Lady Nuan’s face went livid and she stared at him for a moment. Her lips trembled, but no words came out. Jian Xubai had said it all. What else could she say?

“Why is this necessary, Beautiful Lady Nuan?” Seeing that Jian Xubai was already striding away, Ji Su hesitated, but did not immediately catch up with him. He stopped and hurriedly said to Beautiful Lady Nuan, “When Duke arrived in Wuhuan, he was harmed by someone close to him, and his life and death were unpredictable. He had suffered a lot. He wandered in a different country and didn’t have a certain date to return. Although he didn’t show it, how could his heart not struggle? How could he have the mood to talk about marriage with Beautiful Lady Nuan?

“Now that Duke and his wife are in love and harmony, and they even have a daughter. I dare to tell you the truth, you and Duke had the chance but weren’t destined for each other. It is better to take a step back and let it go than to entangle and fight to death. After all, although living in the temporary palace can be quiet and tough, you won’t be lack of clothes or food. You’re still young, so it’s better to think twice before you act on impulse and regret for the rest of your life… There’s no pill for regret in this world!”

He finished these words and arched his hands towards Beautiful Lady Nuan before hurriedly following Jian Xubai.

“Regret?” Beautiful Lady Nuan laughed at herself, recalling the situation back then. Yuan Xuepei treated her the best among the captives from Great Rui, not because Yuan Xuepei had any thoughts about her, but purely because her temperament at that time reminded Yuan Xuepei of his sister Yuan Xue’e. His love for his sister extended to her.

Ji Zifu wasn’t complex. When Ji Zifu was lonely, he loved to talk to her. She realized when she grew up that it was because Ji Zifu was responsible for the capture of all the others, so the others would ignore him if they could. And he was impatient to care about others’ attitudes, so he only had to go to Princess Feinuan, who was quiet and polite, to relieve his loneliness.

Besides, she was so beautiful. Even if he didn’t have any thoughts about her, it was still pleasing to see her.

Only Jian Xubai, however, was always cold and aloof, full of preoccupations.

That year he was standing at the winter corridor watching the snow fall. When he heard someone walking nearby, he cast a casual glance. His gaze was full of gloom and melancholy, but that easily captured the hearts of many.

With the urging of her sisters, Beautiful Lady Nuan asked Yuan Xuepei about it, but Yuan Xuepei answered vaguely. Marquis Boling certainly liked her because of his sister, but she was not his own sister after all, so he could not reveal Jian Xubai’s secret for her.

At first it was out of the urging of her sisters, then it was her own curiosity, and then it became an interest. Finally one day…she pestered Monarch of Wuhuan to mention the marriage to Jian Xubai.

She thought that with her status as a princess and her beautiful face, this would be a sure thing.

But she didn’t expect Jian Xubai to refuse without any room for discussion.

Before today, Beautiful Lady Nuan had thought that the reason for Jian Xubai’s refusal was because of his pride as a Great Rui’s noble.

Only at this time did she realize that in addition to the threat to his life, he had also suffered the reckoning and abandonment of his family then, and was at the most confusing and destabilizing moment in his life.

How could he not be gloomy and depressed?

How could he be in the mood for romance?

Ji Su was right. She and Jian Xubai had the chance, but were not destined for each other. Otherwise, as Jian Xubai stayed in Wuhuan for five years as a captive, why had she never been able to enter his heart, but Madam Song could become Lady of Yan after just a Shangsi Festival Feast?

Fate played a trick on her.

If Jian Xubai hadn’t suffered such a blow, he would still be the same bright and cheerful person he had been when he was raised by the Empress Dowager. With her temperament, while getting along for such a long time, there wasn’t necessarily no chance at all.

If that were the case, she would have been the Lady of Yan today. Then why would she be so upset over the death of Emperor Xianjia and panic, even to the extent of going to Jian Xubai regardless of her dignity and being rebuked and rejected by him?

But in this world, there were no ifs.

As Beautiful Lady Nuan laughed, her tears fell down continuously. She turned to the dark shadows of the flowering trees behind her. She didn’t know when the person came here and how much that person witnessed, but she didn’t care. She just raised her sleeve to wipe away the tears and said in a low voice, “You win. Let’s do as you say!”