Chapter 471 - Selfish

The crash of something resonated in the room and then there were pieces of shattered glass everywhere. Su Wan silently watched the woman who was standing on the window sill, the woman turned around to look at her and smiled. There was no warmth in that smile. It was empty and somewhat cruel, the woman looked at her with a broken gaze as if she was suffering so much that she couldn't even think straight, then the woman parted her lips and spoke in a cold and hoarse voice " I am sorry Wan Wan but mommy can't do this anymore" she sniffed as tears trickled on her cheeks " Look your daddy didn't come to visit us even today, it's your birthday but he didn't even think of showing his face .. why...why didn't he come? How could he do this to you.. to me? He could have just called if he was this busy but I know he must be with that goblin! My dear Wan Wan, when your daddy come please tell him that I died because of him alright?"

Then the woman jumped. Su Wan who watched her jump didn't even flinch and simply stared at the cake that was smashed on the floor. Tell daddy that you died because of him? How naive. If her mother believed that her father would be bothered by her suicide then she was fighting a lost battle. Her father was a good for nothing bastard, who was ruthless enough to dump his pregnant wife alone in this apartment and went out to have fun with his mistress.

Why would he care about her mother?

He didn't care when her mother slashed her wrists and was admitted to the hospital and he didn't care when her mother strangled herself.. so why will he care now? It was a stupid and complete waste of her life. 

Su Wan didn't ponder on this matter for long, she cleaned the house and then called the ambulance before leaving the apartment, when she reached the ground floor a crowd was already surrounding the broken body of her mother. She didn't pay attention to their confused, sympathetic gazes and simply walked to the centre of the gathered crowd. 

Blood. Blood and more blood- the entire floor was covered with blood.

" That woman was really crazy, what was the point of dying for a man who never cared about her? It was pretty stupid if you ask me"

" She must have lost her mind, she actually killed herself on her daughter's birthday, can you believe it? It was like she was trying to shift all hurt on her daughter. If she wanted to die she should have killed herself in front of that man!"

Stupid. Crazy. Pitiful. 

The people around her kept calling her mother names like that but Su Wan knew that her mother was neither of those things, no she was the epitome of a selfish woman. She didn't die because her heart was broken, no she died because she wanted revenge, on her father and his new wife and daughter. She was vain and downright selfish, she killed herself not because she wanted to forget her pain .. she died on her birthday so that Su Wan will never be able to forget her.

Su Wan's eyes snapped open, as she sat up straight on her bed. The illuminating pearl was shining next to her bed and there was no smashed cake or pieces of shattered glass. Su Wan covered her face with her hands and that was when she realized that she was sweating so much that her entire bedsheet was covered with her sweat.

" Damn that woman." cursed Su Wan as she hopped out of her bed and stomped to the door of her room, she was angry and tried - a small nap that was all she wanted but that woman was still haunting her and Su Wan couldn't help but curse if she was going to die just go and die already! What's the point of making your ten-year-old daughter see it? Just because she was the daughter of that bastard? 

Su Wan wished to forget everything but every time her birthday got near, she would end up having nightmares one after another, that woman was sure ruthless, when she couldn't get her father's love she destroyed his reputation. Su Wan was all up for it but the fact that her mother involved her too in that shitty plan of hers made Su Wan despise her even more.

Once she was out of her room, she decided to take a walk around the courtyard to calm herself down. She knew that Lin Rui meant no harm when he wished her but she wished that he said nothing, birthday - it only made things harder for her.

" Wan Wan? What a..are you doing here?" Lin Yu who saw Su Wan come out of her room chased after her, it was two in the morning and he was worried about her when he saw her going out to the courtyard so late at night.  He didn't know what happened that made her upset, but that wasn't enough to let him leave her alone.

Su Wan turned her head and looked at Lin Yu and shook her head " Just go, Yu. Right now, I am not in the correct state of my mind" she was angry and frustrated and there was no way to release that pent up anger. She didn't want to hurt Lin Yu because when she got angry, she wanted to hurt someone- and get hurt in return because that made her feel alive, the pain would give her a sort of relief and she would be able to fill the void that was left behind by her mother.

" I c…can't" Lin Yu limped over to her side and stood in front of her " I can't l..leave you alone when you are this upset, and it's so late at night, I won't be at ease leaving you alone" 

Su Wan stiffened not because Lin Yu was interrupting her alone me time but because his hoarse voice was deep and languid that made shiver dance on her spine. Her gaze snapped to his lips, they were pink and moist … they looked kissable and soft if she.... if she asked then Lin Yu would help her forget this pain won't he?