Chapter 99 - Bonded

~ ZEV ~

His shaking was worrying Sasha, so he changed the subject from the breeding—they agreed that until the humans were gone and they could get more information about what had occurred today, there was no point speculating further. But Zev could see that Dunken was shaken by the idea of what was happening to the females—and what else it might entail that Zev didn't even know.

It took a good hour for Zev to stop shaking after going back into that memory of the breeding arena and the females. But having Sasha so warm and close, the fox hole filled with her scent, her head resting on his shoulder and arms hugging his… it was everything he'd yearned for for so long that it helped his heart ease.

A couple hours after the humans began their search, the three of them were quiet, and Sasha began to doze, her temple resting against his upper arm.

Dunken had been a little restless, checking the view holes and pacing slowly in the space. When he spoke again after so long in silence, Zev almost startled. Sasha's breathing shortened, but soon eased again even as Dunken whispered.

"Your bond is strange," he said, out of nowhere, frowning at Zev. "I can smell it, but it's different to the Chimera bond—is this something the humans have?"

Zev answered in Dunken's head.

I don't know. I didn't recognize it for a long time because it didn't feel like what the other males had described when they bonded. There was no lightning bolt for me. It's like she crept up on me. It grew over time. I think this is what humans mean when they talk about falling in love? It wasn't until we were separated that I realized it was a part of me. More than emotion. Just… a connection. Something about her that pulled me and kept hold of me even when she wasn't there. I couldn't bear it. Couldn't leave her alone—even though she didn't know I was there.

Dunken nodded. "That sounds like the bond. I wouldn't know, of course.." he said wistfully. "All I know is that I wouldn't have recognized it as the bond in your scent if I didn't have the two of you together—it's as if a part of each of your scents is the same. As if you truly are pieces of each other."

Zev was quiet. That was how it felt too—when she was far away, a piece of him was missing. But the distance didn't have to be physical. When she'd tried to flee him, when he thought she might leave by choice and never return… he'd felt a gaping hole open in his chest.

"Is she worth it?" Dunken asked suddenly.

Zev blinked. Yes, without question.

Dunken sighed and began pacing again. "I called her Sasha-don by accident."

Zev snorted. Did she catch it?

"She doesn't know what it means, but she knew I'd given her a title."

Did you tell her what it was?

"No."

Zev held his friend's eyes. "Thank you," he whispered. "But try to keep it back. Let me give it to her."

"Don't thank me yet," Dunken whispered dryly. "You have to get Alpha back first—and she has to accept you. That's going to be harder after today."

Zev turned his head to look down on Sasha who had slumped completely against him and was snuggled into his arm. "It doesn't matter," he breathed. "And she will accept me, I'm certain of it. She feels the bond too. She just doesn't realize that's what she's feeling. She's weathered pressure from the humans every day that I was gone—they told her she was crazy to believe I loved her the way she loved me," he growled, flexing his hand on this thigh because it wanted to close on the throat of the human that had almost convinced her of that. "Now it's time for me to prove to her that she wasn't wrong to hold onto her hope."

Dunken nodded thoughtfully. "Will she understand, though? She seems confused by our traditions."

"She'll understand enough," he said firmly. "And the humans are big on vows and… and promises. Once she forgives me for breaking the promise I made before, once she sees that I've returned to fulfill it, she will take me."

He wished he was as convinced as he sounded. He knew their connection was real, and he loved being so close to her and seeing her eyes sparkle when they landed on him. But she'd pulled back more than once—and he knew there would be many things in the coming days that would frighten her.

Unable to resist, he reached across to comb her hair off her forehead with his free hand. She shifted, rubbing her cheek on his arm and murmuring something unintelligible.

"She's going to stink of you, and you of her, when we leave here," Dunken said, his voice heavy with disapproval. "You shouldn't have come in here."

"There was no choice," Zev said. "I couldn't let her hear those lies and believe them. She needed the truth. This is her life—our life together. I had to tell her," he finished firmly, still watching her face, so smooth and young looking because she was asleep.

Was this what it would be like to wake alongside her? Would he still have the chance, five years from now, to stand over her, protect her when she rested and was vulnerable? He hoped so.

"Would waiting a few hours, even days, until they were forced to acknowledge you really have done so much damage? They're going to try to win her now, Zev. You know that. They were holding back. But after this... they will do everything they can to sway her from you. Your scent on her will only embolden them."

"All the more reason she needed to know the truth." When it looked like Dunken would argue, Zev shook his head. "Nothing we can do about it now. Besides, with what's happening… I think I'm going to have to take a different approach." He lifted his eyes to meet his friend's, only to find Dunken's face shifting quickly from shock to anger.

"No, Zev. Absolutely not!" he hissed.. "You are not challenging Xar directly. You don't have the support! He'll kill you—they'll kill you!"