Chapter 249 - Ch249. Anko's iddle while

It was a quiet summer day, as hot as they came in the Fire Country that was named after its never-ending warm climate, and Anko enjoyed her moment of peace by drinking cool beer and enjoying the occasional pleasant breeze while sitting in the shade on the porch of her house in the Senju Compound, listening to the soft chirping of crickets.

No overly cheerful Naruto demanding she teaches him techniques he is not even prepared for. The kid was smart and knew his shit but he was just so exuberant towards her ever since he found out she genuinely cared... ​​

No steaming Hinata suffering from overheating anytime she was close to the orange-wearing empty-head pretender, and fainting, leaving Anko to take care of her until she woke up. God, she was getting used to unexpected visits from concerned Hiashi about Hinata's condition...

Anko shuddered as she remembered the flirtatious note in the old Hyuuga's tone the last time he demanded a discussion about his daughter's progress. Sure, the man probably held Anko in high regard considering she stopped portraying all that 's.l.u.t' image and actually managed to break Hinata's shy shell in matters of days, making a complete mockery of his years-long attempts, but flirting with her was a bit too much.

It was sweet though, seeing that Hiashi actually cared about Hinata and he simply had no idea how to raise her into a strong woman. That's where Anko came in and now the girl only acted ineptly around Naruto and has actually already beaten her younger sister in a spar. Yay, she won against her four-year-old sister! Anko somewhat couldn't take that as a worthwhile achievement... But well, whatever makes the stuck-up white-eyes happy. Eh, Hyuugas were weird like that.

Anyway, Anko made it her mission to stop any subtle advances Hiashi Hyuuga tried on her. She was barely leaving her teenage years and an old half-stuck-up stickler for rules was eyeing her just because she helped his daughter gain a measure of self-confidence? All it took for her to get attention was to stop wearing clothes that proclaimed she would sleep around for Dango and whatnot?

'Not... happening. Don't go there, brain. Go back to sleep! Anko Hyuuga has a really bad ring to it.' Anko disgruntedly mused, thinking up excuses to avoid Hiashi the next time he gets it into his head to invite her for a family dinner. 'Then again... It's still better than that marriage proposal from the lone survivor of the Shimura clan.' Anko shuddered again, this time in disgust, momentarily choking on her beer.

Yeah... now that she was officially accepted as an honorary Senju, some really fishy and decrepit individuals tried to sink their claws into her.

'Idiots, as if Lady Tsunade let their dirty paws anywhere near the Senju wealth or library.' Anko snorted at the notion that they could get anywhere near it through her while gazing at the sky in contentment. Despite all the uncomfortable situations, Anko was grateful for Lady Tsunade offering her this chance which completely changed her life for the better.

There was only one of her supposed students Anko didn't miss.

The Uchiha.

One nice calm afternoon, her bright orange-wearing idiot-wannabe-actor dragged in screaming and kicking Sasuke Uchiha, enthusiastically proclaiming he found a new friend, utterly ignoring the piercing and irritated looks the duck-butt-haired broody kid was throwing his way. In the end, the Uchiha relented and joined their training sessions.

Anko might not have liked it but she came to care about Naruto too much to just say 'f.u.c.k off' and ruin it for him. That said, the look in the Uchiha's eyes was still unsettling. She knew what he felt. She was there... not at the same level of low, but she was pretty close after Orochimaru betrayed her. Anko had nothing against the kid himself. She simply didn't believe somebody in so much repressed emotional pain should be anywhere near her. The Uchiha did not need her or her tutelage. The kid needed a hard-core year-long session with Yamanaka.

Then there was all the political bullshit when it came out she was training the last loyal Uchiha headcase. 'Heh, even the Elders called the kid unstable in between the lines.' Anko giggled before bursting into genuine laughter. 'Then again, they have called me worse! No wonder they have a problem with me teaching the kid... one depressed headcase teaching another. Hmm~… throwing those kunai so close to his jugular might not have been the brightest idea. Eh, who cares? A hospital stay would do him some good.'

It was all in good humor, after all. A few nonwashable blood-stains near the neck area would teach the kid he is not invincible.

Fun thoughts...

"I must give it to Naruto... dragging Uchiha here was a prank worthy of Prankster God." Anko whispered as she took another sip from her drink.

Civilians simply didn't know how to react when the last loyal Uchiha princeling appeared together with the Uzumaki demonish menace. Oh, Anko had no delusions that Naruto befriended Uchiha out of some misplaced sense of camaraderie. That was the first thing she has beaten out of him. She made sure to hammer all Konoha propaganda out of his head early on. If given a chance, Anko doubted Naruto would become a ninja for Konoha after her tutoring sessions. She, however, made it damn clear he has no such chance because of his tenant.

No... Naruto befriended Uchiha to mess with the heads of civilians and council alike.

Honestly! The kid was becoming as bad as Hatake Kakashi. She should have never explained psychological warfare to him...

Using Kakashi as an example of what NOT to do might have been a bad idea too...

Well, who knew being a big sister was such hard work!

The first time Naruto attempted to come late to their training sessions, Anko dragged him from the Ichiraku ramen stand by his ankle so erratically, he puked all the ramen out on himself by the time they reached the Senju Compound, and then she made him practice taijutsu katas without letting him change his clothes all the while she was throwing senbons at him, aiming at the most painful but otherwise harmful places. She might or might not have added a bit of pain-intensifying poison to the mix but hey... she is here to teach the kid, not to coddle him!

Anko was resolved. On the briefest sign of relapse, she would beat the Kakashism out of him, no matter if it was the last thing in the kid's life. Kyuubi Jinchuuriki or not, there were easier ways to destroy Konoha than creating another Kakashi Hatake wannabe.

"Being a teacher is such a drag..." Anko muttered with a sigh.

"You will get no argument about that from me." A voice resounded from nearby, jolting Anko to full awareness, causing her to jump on her feet and grab the kunai hidden in her sleeve near-instantly. She prepared for a fight.. only to owlishly blink as her eyes landed on a blond-haired woman watching her with smug satisfaction at her bewildered look.

"Vacation?" Tsunade inquisitively lifted her eyebrow at the literal stack of beer and sake bottles strewn around the porch.

"Uh..." Anko furrowed her brows before she realized what Tsunade was looking at, causing her to blush from embarrassment. Realizing she wasn't setting a stellar example, she ducked her head and tried to give Tsunade an innocent look, "Welcome home, Lady Tsunade?"

Only to be smacked upside down by Tsunade, sending her gently, according to Tsunade's standards, face-first into the ground. Tsunade just rolled her eyes at the now downed unruly girl, not even attempting to hide her small amused smile.

"Yeah... I am home."

The sarcasm in that sentence was felt even by the fabled fence-sitter back in Iwa, causing him a shudder.