70 Marcy's anger

When Emp woke up, he felt rather lost, pained and feeble. It wasn't the first time he felt this way but this time, his bad condition was entirely physical.

His throat and mouth were dry, his limbs didn't want to move according to his will and a million imaginary needles were pricking his leg constantly. Those weren't small needles either, they were large things that would scare children and adults alike.

He used a lot of his strength to open his eyes into slits and looked around him.

On him laid a thin white cloth covering both him and the bed. Bright sunlight shined through the windows revealing a bright and simple scene. No curtains had been obstructing the sun warming this peaceful day.

His memories were all jumbled and foggy but he could remember he was in the medical hall and even if he had not, it would have been easy to see.

The place had three kinds of things; beds, shelves with all kinds of medicine, many chairs and bedside tables. The hall was enormous but a single small table was the only furniture that wasn't one of the four previous thing. It was the table the healers had been sitting around when he had first showed up.

Between each bed, a short row of chair waited for either healers or visitors to use them. Aside from his own, all other beds were unoccupied. Sat on the chairs around him, a lot of people were dozing off.

There were of course his two loyal servants. They were both sound asleep, leaning against each other to prevent themselves from falling from the chairs. They were dressed just like the last time he had seen them so he must not have been unconscious for long.

Then, there was the duke. He was pacing back and forth at the foot of his bed. He wore expensive noble clothes and an army of servants kept their eyes on him in order to instantly grant any of his wishes the moment they were formulated.

Aside from him and his many servants, there were also a sizeable amount of healers at his bedside, waiting for any and all change in his condition. Many of them seemed utterly tired, they might not have slept at all last night in order to save his leg.

The teacher Heinrich was nowhere to be seen. Emp guessed he had a class to attend to this morning.

The moment Emp opened his eyes for more than half of what they could, the silent and tense scene exploded with life.

"My lord! He's awake." One of the healers noticed.

The duke spun on himself to turn his way and rushed to his bedside, pushing a few healers out of his way. He grabbed Emp by the shoulders and shook him in anger.

"Bloody depths of all wrong lad! Why must ye be like so? Ye tryin your best ta make me look like an idiot to your dah or what? Already twice now you escaped some inconsis- insa- escaped trouble! I'm supposed to keep an eye on ye but twice in this short year ye almost died! Yer father will chop me head off twice if he hears of this! How did ye even get that viscously injured inside of a bloody school?"

The duke was so mad he fumbled through his own speech a lot and his servants didn't get the chance to correct his words like they usually did. At least, Emp understood he meant viciously rather than viscously. Or at least, he hoped that was what he meant.

He tried to form an answer but his mouth was too dry and his voice too weak to convey any real meaning.

"My lord please!" The healers all urged him. "He now needs a lot of rest, it is not wise to shake him too vigorously."

The duke gave them an annoyed grunt and released him. While the old man was trying to regain his calm, the two girls came to the other side of his bed. The loud shouts of the duke had awakened them.

"Master! Do you feel any better now?" Harriett asked earnestly.

He gave her a small nod as an answer. He felt warmed up by the smile the two gave him.

"Master must be parched, I'll go get some water."

She came back quickly and carefully fed him the water. It was a good thing she was here because he felt too weak to hold the cup properly. With her help, he drank the refreshing liquid steadily.

Even after he was done though, he found speaking to be difficult. His voice only came out as a whisper.

"Thank you."

"You know, when I told ye to tell me if something happened to ye, I meant before you break all the bones in your leg." The old man said. "Can't ye tell me before ye try something dangerous instead of after?"

His answer was slow and his voice strained.

"I'm sorry. I was hunting with a group of thirty and we came across an unnameable of chaos. I did not think it would be so fast. I was not hurt inside the school."

While he was apologizing, he had to remember that Marcy would be way more angry than the old duke, and way more worried too. He immediately made the other him reappear in Dark-glint.

"An unmovable of chaos? Lad, you will now tell me exactly how ya came across such a thing in details. Did ye kill it at least?"

Emp would have better liked if he had let the healers tell him how is leg was first but he could only go along with the wishes of the duke.

***

When Emp found himself back in Marcy's home, he discovered that she had placed a chair close to where he had disappeared and sat there the whole time.

There was no one here but her. The moment he got here, he saw the hard face she was making. She must have been worried. Seeing her like this, Emp was reminded of Willow's mother when they had brought her back, so relieved yet so angry.

Emp did not know what he should say first. There were so many things. The three most important things he needed to do right now where to arrange the reward for the huntresses, let Marcy vent her anger and tell her about Chijou. Maybe he should let her speak first?

The two stared at each other. She had not let out a noise since he had come back. She did know he was there right? She was looking straight at him, she couldn't possibly be so lost in thoughts that she didn't notice he was back. Maybe she didn't know what to say either. Was she that angry?

He chose to start things off with a simple greeting. Maybe when the first words would be spoken, things would progress more smoothly.

"Hi mom."

This time at least, he had remembered to call her that rather than Marcy. He felt it was a great start.

"Hi? That's all ya have to say!"

Or maybe not? She had seemed like a motionless lake but the moment he said "hi", it was like someone set fire to it and everything started to boil and storm.

"I'm so angry I can't speak!"

Emp believed that if there had been some furniture close to her, she would have broken it down in her anger. It took her a while before she managed to shout her next sentence.

"Was I not clear when I told ya to run! What crossed your mind when ya decided it was a good idea to fight such a thing?"

Emp had seen many people get angry before. Many of them had been angry because of him too. Usually though, he didn't mind it much. They could yell all they wanted, it didn't disturb him or scare him in any way. Galana's anger was even weaker as he only found it comical. Here though, he wished the other him would recall him right away.

True anger, he found out, was only effective when you felt strongly for the other. Marcy held a lot of weight in his heart, he respected her a lot and she even considered him as family. Seeing her with such a angry expression was enough to stop his blood flow.

"I felt like we could beat it."

"Have ya no brain! It killed ten of them from the thirty that went out with ya! Ya could easily have been one of them! The whole back of yar armor was turned into purple stuff and yar leg was mushed into paste! At what point through all that did ya think ya could beat it! Ya should have ran like I told ya to!"

"But then more of them would have died."

"Then let them! Because ya couldn't save Vesa doesn't mean ya have to risk yar own life every time ya see someone in trouble! Ya're not a soldier ya slag, ya have the choice to escape! Ya don't have to die for shitty nonsense!"

Emp would have shrunk back from shame but he did not have the strength, he could only stare pitifully. She released a heavy sigh and leaned back a bit.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that ya shouldn't help when ya can. Of course ya should. I'm just saying that sometimes, it would be wiser to ignore it. Has no one taught ya the difference between brave and foolish?"

"I understand-"

"Ya clearly don't! Ya were so desperate ya had to resort to using an apple as a weapon! If ya really understood, ya would have turned back way before that!"

"But it was you who told me to go in the first place." He complained weakly.

"I expected a lot of things but not an unnameable of chaos! That was why I told ya to run in case it seemed too dangerous! I wanted ya to help them a bit not blindly attack such a thing! Don't ya understand the danger ya were in? I thought it was obvious but do I have to tell you that you are forbidden to die?"

"No..."

"Then why is it that you come back to me like this? Why is it that you thought it would be a good idea to do this?"

"I didn't think-"

"That's right! You didn't think! You shouldn't fight against things that are so much stronger than you that they can kill you with their little finger."

"It didn't look so bad."

She took a deep breath to calm her anger a bit.

"My boy, I would punch ya if ya weren't so badly injured right now."

"I'm sorry."

"Ya aren't! Instead ya feel like ya helped bring back as many of those girls as possible. Ya haven't learned yar lesson at all. If the same happened, ya would do it again, wouldn't ya?"

Emp replayed the scene in his head again. He tried to figure out what he could have done better now that he wasn't in the middle of it anymore. He was the one that had cut the tentacles, if he had not been there, everyone would have died from the black liquid. Then, no one would have known what was there. If the village decided to get rid of the thing themselves or if the monster decided to move towards the village before the army came to their help, many people he knew could have died. Him fighting it now was the best outcome he could see.

"I would."

There was another big sigh from her and with a defeated look, she dragged her chair towards him until it bumped against his bed. She grabbed his forehead into her large warrior hand and rubbed it against his pillow in frustration, sweeping it left and right as a form of punishment.

Emp was too weak to resist and could only endure the burning sensation at the back of his head from all the rubbing.

"Seriously my boy, what will I do with such an inconsiderate son? Ya should value yar own life more. Ya aren't a tool to be used by others like a forge hammer, ya are yar own man. Make sure ya can save yarself before ya think about others. I just want ya to be safe."

Those were meant as comforting words after her outburst but Emp couldn't help but think they were wrong. He was a tool made for a purpose. There was a goal he needed to achieve, he was made only for that.

Once she was done with all that rubbing, she grabbed his right arm instead to see if it was back to normal. She moved it up and down and then over his head to see if he had any reaction.

"How are yar wounds now? How much did it cost ya to have them fixed?"

"I don't know. I hadn't asked yet when I came back. I wanted to get here as soon as possible because I did not want you to worry."

He saw the shadow of a smile appear on her face but it was quickly replaced by her stern look.

"If ya don't want me to worry then don't do such a stupid thing in the first place. Hmf, since you don't know, let me take a look."

She moved down to his leg and rolled up his pants to reveal it. It was all purple-brown and purple-red in large spots. There was not an inch of skin that was of its usual color. From Emp's point of view, it seemed way larger than usual too.

"It looks much better than before." Commented Marcy. "Does it hurt?"

"Yes but much less than earlier. Now it just feels as if I put my whole leg inside the furnace."

She nodded. The pain seemed unreasonable enough to stop him from having a conversation but not only did he not have the strength to complain about it, that level of pain was a relief compared to what he felt before.

"Can ya move it?"

"I don't have the strength to move anything right now."

He felt that they had probably used a lot of his own vitality as sacrifice for the spells used to save his leg. That would explain why he had no strength at all and why they hadn't dared heal his leg all the way back to normal. Taking anymore than that would have been dangerous for his life.

"I get it, I'll let ya sleep and ask the Champom girl to make ya something filling."

She was in the process of rising up from the chair when Emp called her back.

"Wait, I still need to talk."

"Can't it wait for later?"

She did not sit back down Immediately, there was an unsure frown across her face. She seemed to not really want to hear what he had to say next. Was it because she was anxious about what he wanted to talk about or only because she wanted him to get better soon?

"I promised to myself I would tell you the moment I came back. Can you please stay a bit longer."

She hesitated a bit more before finally leaning back onto the chair.

"Fine, tell me, what do ya have to say?"

She knew he was about to talk about Chijou and she clearly didn't like it too much. She closed her eyes and took slow and deep breaths to prepare herself.

"While we were looking for the creature, the huntresses told me about you and Chijou. I didn't know that it was him your lover."

"So ya want me to tell ya how it was between me and Chijou?"

That possibility seemed to have reassured her a bit but it was a wrong assumption.

"No, that's not what I wanted to say. I wanted to tell you that I know what happened to him."

Her fingers squeezed her two hands together strongly when he said it.

"How would ya know?"

"It was Chinui that told me..."

Her eyes shot open and stared holes into him. It looked like she was ready to tear his head off at the first wrong word exiting his mouth.

"Who are ya?"

"That's a longer story but I will tell you."

"You better not leave anything out."

He then told her about his four creators explaining how it was because of this that he had two souls, revealing to her that the ring he had used in the new year was a birth gift from Love and how he had stumbled upon Chinui's house.

"Are ya saying ya just found the great general in the woods randomly?"

"Yes. I stayed a few months with him."

"Ya know yar story is really hard to believe right?"

"Yes, that's why I don't like to talk about it."

"So... do ya have a proof that ya at least met Chinui?"

"I uh... please look at my full name."

He willed his hunting card to appear and there it was, displayed at the very top, Emperor Muracier.

A jolt passed through her and she recoiled a bit from the card.

"I see now why ya said people reacted strangely when they saw yar name. What was he doing in the woods all the way there though? What did he say about his brother?"

That was the hard part to say. He had to swallow his nervousness before he managed to say it.

"He said that the thundering pass battle went wrong. The guys commanded by Chijou weren't in the spot they were supposed to. He said it was the emperor who gave a wrong order and because of that order... Chijou died."

Her fingers twitched and she closed her eyes again.

"After that, Chinui got very angry and left. He said he would not come back as long as Billow Grandbois would be the emperor. That's why he is so far out in the woods."

"..."

She was chewing on her own lips and quickly placed a hand over her eyes as if to hide herself from the news. She did not say a word.

"I'm sorry. If I had known how close you were to him, I would have told you right away but you never spoke of his name."

"W... Where?"

"He's taken roots in Chinui's backyard, there's already a good tree over him."

She was shaking now. Those were silent sobs weren't they? She was just hiding her tears. His own eyes started to burn as well. It was painful to look at Marcy like that.

He forced his hand away from his side and reached out to her. Letting his powerless arm fall on her knees.

"That's why you don't like secrets isn't it? No one told you when you asked them."

"I... I need to be alone now. Rest for a bit."

Her voice was quaking in grief. She gently pushed his hand back onto the bed and left with slow pained steps, closing the door behind her and leaving him to rest.

Emp stared at the door for a while. Had he done the right thing? He was convinced this was the best he could do but it still didn't feel right.

He still had a lot of things to do but he couldn't get the sad figure of Marcy out of his head. Even if he could have, he was unable to move. Really, his only option was to sleep but, somehow, he couldn't. It wasn't that he was not tired but instead that he felt guilty about making Marcy cry.

He had heard of people tossing and turning in their beds before. This was definitely it. He was not moving at all but it was all the same. However long he closed his eyes, sleep would not take him. He found every little thing to be distracting. His leg, the position of his arm, an itch under his foot, all excuses to move his thoughts away from what had happened.

He really had not wanted to hurt Marcy with his words, he was so sorry. He wanted her to come back so that he could tell her.

He felt that he waited there looking at his ceiling for a long time. He noticed that some of the planks up there were a bit old, a few had bent out of shape probably a long time ago. Was the rest of the house like that too? He should replace those with new ones soon, maybe take a look at the roof as well while he was there. Marcy would like that right?

Finally, the door was gently pushed open. Emp was about to call Marcy but was surprised to discover Calla at the door instead.

"Calla?"

She gave him a warm smile when he called her name.

"You're awake." Her voice was full of relief. "Marcy said she'd tell me if you woke up but she left with a really big sword a while ago so I had to check by myself."

"With a big sword? Do you know where she went?"

"Not far I think, she went straight towards the woods and brought nothing else."

Emp wondered what she was doing. This was curious, he hoped she wouldn't do anything reckless with it.

There was a short pause where neither said anything. Calla was standing in the doorway with her hands behind her back, her warm green eyes looking over him.

"Are you hungry?" She suddenly asked. "I cooked you something but I didn't know if you would be up to eat anything soon. I feel a bit silly."

Now that she spoke about it, it was true that he was really hungry. His stomach had been growling ever since he woke up.

"I am super hungry." He answered her. "But I feel too weak to lift my arm and hold the utensils."

"Don't worry about that, I'll help you."

She turned around with a gentle smile and left to the kitchen. Shortly after she came back with a large fuming bowl, its smell alone was enough to make him salivate.

"I made an heart stew, with scareants mushrooms my sisters picked in the orchard, scented herbs, plenty of vegetables from my garden and healthy bits of meat to give you back some strength."

Scareants mushrooms were a sort of large brown fungus with a peculiar scent that scared ants away. They were well loved by people like the Champom who grew trees because most of the ants living in the Steelwood empire were different kinds of aggressive carpenter ants.

The stem of those mushrooms where thin and pale but the cap was always large and meaty. Those caps had a dark brown shade and an easily recognizable sour scent but when cooked, they turned out to be delicious.

They were often seen growing at the foot of all kinds of trees and the orchardists took great care of them. (1) They helped it grow around the trees and harvested them along with the fruits they were growing.

Emp had often tasted the scareants mushrooms and calla cooked them very well but...

"A heart stew?"

"Mhn, we get plenty of meat so people often throw bits like the heart away but they should not, it's just as good as the rest when you prepare it well. Grandma told me once that grandpa believed that eating the heart of a strong beast would give him some of its strength. I don't think that's true but it's still good to the taste."

Emp had a strong impression left in him of Chinui telling him to not waste any part of what he caught so he wasn't truly against eating the heart of an animal. It was instead Calla herself he had a hard time understanding. He had been curious about it for a while already. How could she be so disgusted and scared of a dismantling but so easily cook meat as if it was nothing at all?

"How come you aren't scared of cooking meat but you can't look when we cut a prey open?"

She drew circles in the stew with a spoon while she answered.

"It doesn't feel the same to me. One is violent and scary, there's blood and skin, I can't watch as its torn apart, it's too much. When there's only the meat and me though, I can see all kinds of possible meals, I can feel its texture, picture the perfect result and cut the pieces I need easily. The bones to enhance a soup, the fat to melt and make a sauce, there's only food there." (2)

So for her, cooking was so engrossing that she could leave aside all the rest. Emp thought it was impressive.

She placed the bowl on the chair Marcy had left and kindly helped him to sit into the bed, with his back against the wall.

"I see," He answered. "thank you for helping me."

"Mhn, you need to sit properly in order to eat."

She picked back up the bowl and after placing the chair to be at the head of the bed she sat back on it.

"I don't think it's too hot to eat now."

She took a spoonful of stew and brought it to his mouth by bending forward. Her large overly-loose braid fell to the side of her head and balanced in between him and her, casting a shade on the bowl in her hand.

He had no reason to resist her angelic smile so he just let her deliver the food to his mouth. The taste was wonderful, the flavors mixed well together and were full of vigor. It was a meal that said "get well soon", he could feel the warmth of it spread all the way down to his bones. The meat would melt into his mouth and the mushrooms burst under his teeth every time he chewed on them.

He let a pleased sigh escape his mouth after he was done with the first bite and Calla seemed even happier than before.

"I hoped you would like it."

"Of course I would like it, you are the one who made it after all. Everything you cook is stunningly tasty."

She just continued to smile and gave him another bite.

Emp savored the whole bowl of it in the warm peace brought by her care. He felt so calmed by it that his concern for Marcy floated out of his mind like mist. He could feel some of his strength come back to him as his belly was filled.

Once they were done, she kindly asked if he wanted another one and of course, he said yes. He was still very hungry.

It was only after he had emptied a third large bowl that his stomach finally calmed down.

"You were very hungry." Calla commented in amazement.

"It must have been a very special meal. It was so good that I couldn't help myself but want more after each spoon of it. Thank you Calla, that was wonderful."

"I'm glad."

She wasn't surprised by his words since she could see from the beginning how much he loved it.

"Say, was it true that the apple saved you?"

"Yes, I... Sorry, I was a bit strange yesterday was I not."

She blushed a bit but shook her head to tell him he was wrong.

"I do not mind at all. Could you tell me, how? I can't, I mean, my apple, how could it possibly save you?"

Emp told her earnestly.

"When the monster grabbed me by the leg and readied itself to kill me, it raised me over to its face. I squeezed the apple over its eyes and the juices blinded it. Because it was blinded, we were able to turn the tables on it. I don't know what would have happened if I did not have that apple then. I'm very grateful for it. I was sure it would please you to know."

She answered with a few nods. It was the kind of faces he really liked to see. This made him think of Marcy again, he wanted to cheer her up somehow. Maybe Calla would have a trick.

"Calla, I made Marcy cry, how do I fix this."

"Mnnnn. First, I think you need to apologize earnestly. I'm sure she knows you didn't mean to make her cry but apologies are always a good start. After that, I'm not sure."

"You're not sure?"

"I don't know what would cheer up Marcy. I would say you have to bring her a gift or work hard to help her but you should rest for now. If it was me, I would apologize with a good meal but it doesn't seem like something you would do."

Not only that but the food he made himself was far worse than the food Calla could prepare.

"Have you no idea that could help me then?"

"No, sorry."

She seemed a bit disappointed that she was unable to help him but Emp didn't hold it against her. It may be for the best if he found the answer on his own.

"It's fine, I'll just... Marcy?"

She had stepped into the doorway. She did not seem as miserable as before but the sword she brought with her wasn't in the same boat. It was all chipped and the blade was bent as if it had been used for years.

"Why don't ya call me mom?"

She seemed really disappointed.

He had forgot again, he had been too surprised to see her there. He had not heard her come in.

"Sorry, you surprised me."

After another awkward silence, it was Calla that spoke first.

"I think I'll leave you two alone now. Good luck Emp, I'll bring you something else later."

"Thank you Calla."

She got up from the chair and walked past Marcy in a hurry.

"Sorry girl."

"It's fine" Calla told her with a shake of her hair and a smile.

Once she had left, Marcy placed the huge sword against the wall and took her place on the chair.

"I'm very sorry mom. I really did not want to make you cry. I just thought it would be worse to hide it from you."

"It's fine, ya did the right thing... I guess in a way, I already knew he was dead. If he had been alive, he would have came back long ago or at least, sent me a message. I just didn't think it would be this hard to hear it confirmed."

"I feel really bad, first I scared you and then I made you cry. Can I do something?"

"Ya're already doing fine Emp."

She ruffled his hair and offered him a weak smile.

"Just ya being there is already good. Calms me a bit."

Emp thought it was great but she changed back to an angry look right away.

"Don't think I forgot about how you put yourself in danger though! You better believe I'll punish you once you're better!"

After that, they talked a lot about both of their pasts, what he was doing in Bêtéclair and how she found her way to Dark-glint. They talked for so long that they were still at it when the sun had come close to the horizon and Calla came back to cook food in their kitchen.

She did not tell him what happened with the sword but the answer seemed obvious.

Then, that night, he slept very well. Marcy had seemed in a much better mood after their long talk. She had been curious about all the things he kept hidden for a while now, having them finally revealed must have been fun to her.

***

(1) orchardists are those taking care of orchards. I believe this is a real word.

(2) I would say gravy instead of sauce but they don't have corn or wheat readily available. Maybe she could replace it with mashed apples or potatoes though. How about it, apple gravy, has anyone tried that? My guess is that it won't work the same since grains and apples don't have the same texture at all but who knows. Fun fact, in french, potatoes are called earth apples. they don't have a real name for themselves.