Chapter 122 Talk

Alan fled to his room in shame. He lay on his bed and felt like crying. I guess there's no denying it: I really want to fuck my mother. I mean, that wasn't actually my intention at the time, not consciously, but if it had just accidentally slipped in, man! I would have been aaaaall over that! And I suppose I was unconsciously positioning myself so that an accident could happen.

I just can't stop myself! She's just too fuckable. I mean, God! Mom is just too hot! It's like I have an easily-aroused Cindy Crawford for a mom. How am I supposed to control myself? Jesus, even when she walked off upset, all I could do was watch her firm, bare ass cheeks undulate up and down. This is so fucked up! I don't know which is worse, that I feel guilty for wanting to fuck her, or that I feel regretful that I came too soon, before I COULD fuck her!

He was just about to break down and cry when he heard a knock on his door.

It was Suzanne. She came in and talked to him for a few minutes. She'd been secretly monitoring the "massage" from a nearby room to make sure Alan didn't make any mistakes, and for a long time she'd been impressed with his restraint, as well as his ability to slowly work Susan up to a lusty lather, but unfortunately there was nothing she could do to fix the sudden ending that disappointed him so much.

She had to admit that she'd been spying, in order to convince him that he'd done nothing wrong.

Alan was a bit miffed at being spied upon, but it was hard to really get upset with a woman as gorgeous as Suzanne, especially when she'd just confessed that she'd gotten so aroused that she had played with herself. She raised Alan's spirits, encouraging him to go and talk to Susan so she wouldn't be left feeling so bad.

After a few more minutes, Alan pulled himself together. He put on some clothes and went to find his mother.

She was on her bed, crying. She could scarcely believe some of the things she'd thought and said just a short time before.

"Mom, I'm really sorry," he said as he knocked on her open door. He noticed she was again fully dressed and cleaned up, just like he was. She looked like innocence personified, with a long blue skirt that went down to her ankles, a long-sleeved white blouse that buttoned all the way up to her neck, and a big white ribbon in her hair. "It's just this medical treatment I have. Obviously, we both are still learning how to deal with it, and sometimes we get confused."

"You damned well better be sorry!" she said angrily as she looked up at him. But in an instant, her mood changed completely to one of self-pity. "You're right. I'm confused. So confused!" She raised her hands to her face and resumed sobbing into them.

Alan, following the advice Suzanne had just given him, said, "Mom, of course you're confused. Anyone in your shoes would be confused. But I think you're doing a great job. You've quickly adapted and done things that are totally against your usual way of doing things, just because you love me and want to help me."

Susan, however, just sobbed some more. She said into her hands, "I wish that were true. Unfortunately, I'm not doing all this just for you. Sometimes I like it too much, for my own bodily desires. And by 'it,' I mean pleasuring... pleasuring... your, your... your member! Gaawwwd, I'm such a horrible mother! And wife!" The reminder of her marital status resulted in even more anguished sobs.

He sat next to her and wrapped his arm around her in a comforting manner. "Come on, Mom, don't be so hard on yourself. I was just talking to Aunt Suzy about this, and we both agree. There's nothing shameful about you feeling good when you help me. In fact, it's really a very good thing."

Susan finally looked up into his eyes, just to see if he were crazy. "A GOOD thing?! Are you kidding me?"

"I'm serious. Think about it. Mom, I love you and I want to see you happy, and I've known for a long time that you haven't been that happy. But lately, you've been feeling much better! Haven't you?"

"Well, yes, sometimes. But other times I feel just awful." She felt a stab of shame as it occurred to her that all her recent happiest times seemed to have involved Alan's erection, one way or another.

He said, "That's because guilt is holding you back. But there's nothing wrong with feeling good from helping out someone you love with their medical treatment."

Susan stared off into the distance with a devilish gleam in her eye. "Suzanne keeps telling me that, but it just doesn't sit right with me. Things seem to be spiraling out of control, and there's no excuse for that. Thanks for caring, though."

She leaned into him and threw her arms around him. "Son, we help each other out, don't we? What would I do without you?" She kissed him on the cheek.

Then she suddenly changed her mind and pulled her arms away. "Wait. Scratch that kiss. Why don't you move a little farther away? Let's not get started again."

He did so, by standing up.

She continued, with a distraught expression, "It's not that I don't want to hug or kiss you, but I think we should avoid touching each other for a little while. I mean, I know the massage started off innocently enough - I was really sore from too much exercise, and you were just helping out. But once you start touching me like that, I lose control."

"Like what?"

"Well, like anywhere on my body! But especially my breasts. We really need to enforce the rule that you can't touch me there. I've been far too lax. You don't know how sensitive my breasts are. Once you start touching them, I start to think and do crazy things."

Hearing that, Alan had a hard time not getting horny all over again. He thought, It's like Mom has an 'on' button for sex, and it's her big boobs! How awesome is that? But now's not the time to think along those lines. I need to be here for her, and help her.

She continued, "So please. It's not your fault, exactly. Let's just forget this ever happened, and go back to how things used to be. No touching! Your father will be here the day after tomorrow, and while he's here we can't touch each other in any improper manner, not even abnormality checks, not even the most innocent massage. Suzanne's going to be helping you do your thing all by herself. Are you okay with that?"

He hung his head. "Okay." That announcement would have made him very sad, except that Suzanne had warned him that Susan probably would come to a conclusion like that, and that he should just go along with it for the time being. Suzanne promised to make sure Susan's plans wouldn't become his reality for very long.